A Search for Relevance...

Updating, Upheaval, and JOY and HOPE!

2012-01-26T15:24:00.000-08:00

It's funny I was just about through with this very blog post and wasn't feeling it so much! It didn't feel right and didn't feel like me so I clicked over to facebook and then clicked back here and the aforementioned blog post was gone.

So here we go again! To say that this blog has been neglected would be a gross understatement! It's almost been a year since I've blogged. I recently wanted to come back and start writing here again. I know it seems like a new years resolution that many people have that just seems ridiculous but humor us and me. It didn't come from a new years resolution per say it can because I love to blog because it really causes me to reflect on my life and what God's done in it.

I live in a life of anniversaries, like one particular anniversary is that it's been two years since I moved back to Colorado from an amazing two years living with some of the very best people I know that are family to me!

I often get asked if I would like to return to Hawaii and the work that I was doing there. More times then not I say yes. Well I'd also say no because I really had no idea what the Lord had for me here in Colorado. So my answer was in a state of flux like the wind. But I realized recently that, that's not what the Lord has for me. God's planted me here in Colorado and I am really thankful for it... or am becoming thankful. I ran into a friend at a coffee shop the other day (Solid Grounds - the most amazing coffee shop check it out if you haven't). She's been in a very similar situation and was asking about my life and asked those very same questions that. I whined a little bit but said that God had planted me here. She challenged me that I needed to stop whining because GOD has planted me here!

TRUTH!!!!!

I need to stop whining! I need to start trusting more!

I said that I loved blogging because of the reflection that it makes you go through. The best thing I love about YWAM is the community. That's something that I really have missed SOO MUCH!!! I've looked here and there and have met some truly AMAZING people who've challenged me in different ways. But there was still a void something missing. So that's been my prayer over the past two years that the Lord would bring me a brother to come a long side me and encourage me and I could do like wise. I am on Junior High staff at my amazing church Mission Hills. I've known the Junior High Pastor for a few years. We've been very similar. However where the crazy part where I am thanking the Lord for. I committed to praying with Matt before Sunday Morning's and Wednesday Night's and through that I'm starting to really see the Lord break through in the lives of Junior Higher's. However the part that I'm particularly thankful for it the brotherhood that has begun to grow between Matt and I. It's an answer to prayer I'm thankful to the Lord for that!

I'm thankful to the place that I am in with the Lord. There is such a depth where I'm at with Jesus right now! I am not perfect and I won't ever be! Isn't that great! Jesus is more then enough! I know what my identity is and I am complete with that because it is made in the image and likeness of Christ! The harder part is to not get discouraged when the world comes at you in many forms and facets trying to get you to think like them! There are times that I really want to stop fighting and think like them! But I love my life with Jesus and wouldn't settle for anything less, then more of HIM!

So I'm settling in Colorado for the long haul and I am SO EXCITED ABOUT IT!!! I'm really committing to the plans that the Lord has for me here and the plans that he has for Colorado! One thing that has been uncertain is a job here in Colorado. I have felt like I want to be secure in my finances so that not that this is happening anytime soon but when I want to get married and have a family that I am not struggling to provide for them. Not that I can't trust in the Lord for those things and am totally willing to walk down that path if that is what the Lord has for me. I don't really feel like that's what Jesus is leading me too! So I've been looking for a job. If you know me and have spent anytime with me you know that I've been looking and looking and looking some more. I have been the final candidate in more jobs then I can count and they always go to someone else. Mind you these jobs have been jobs they haven't been anything that I've been excited about, that I get passionate about they are just jobs. Nothing wrong with them but they haven't felt exactly right. Up until this job that I have recently applied for and am waiting to hear back from. It's literally a perfect job for me! No joke! It encompasses so much of what I am passionate about. It's here in Colorado. I have been praying and praying for and about this job. There have been several crazy confirmations for me that I'm on the right path - like several people that I haven't spoken to asking me to pray for them about jobs that would put them in similar fields and areas as me.

I have also been having to trust God completely with this one 100%. Simply because that's what the Lord wants. For example normally with jobs after one has submitted your resume to a company you email them a follow up email bragging about yourself and how you would be perfect for the job. God has not allowed me to do this because I've tried to email people on several occasions and haven't been able to put into appropriate words about how amazing I am or even on those occasions when I am particularly stubborn and am able to produce and email I can't press send.

I have not had this much spiritual warfare over a job ever. I have been paralyzed with fear and doubt. The enemy has lied to me telling me that I shouldn't get people to pray for me and getting this job because it will jinx me and my chances of getting it.

Right now this job is a desire of my heart. I feel like this is part of the missing piece in me finally settling fully here in Colorado! So friends please pray for me!

Perfectly discontent... SCREAMING FOR SILENCE TO HEAR HIS VOICE!

2011-06-25T20:52:00.000-07:00

So it's been just about been a little over a year since I've been out of full time ministry. It's been a rough go to say the least. Struggling to find a job, wondering if I did the right thing by leaving Hawaii to come back home. Wondering if God even wanted me to have a job. Becoming completely worn out by the expectations of people around me. So much so that I literally had become burnt out by those expectations. I'm sitting here reflecting on my life realizing how much of my life was spent on the expectations when the only person who I should have cared about, his voice was pushed into the background.

My heart is full of hurt because not once did those around me ask me what God was speaking to me about this season. I don't say this to point a finger or to place blame. However what would happen if we encouraged each other to really follow after the Lord no matter what that looked like. We accuse our brother's and sister's of being flippant with their faith, in various shapes and forms whether it's to go on to the mission field or to begin praying more. To sacrifice their job to do what the Lord has called them to do or to be.

I am so afraid that we have placed the voice of the world in front of that God. We are expected to have a job that pays as much as we can possibly get, have a car, a wife, kids. None of those things are inherently wrong, but when they are placed about the Lordship of Jesus Christ and his authority we have a large problem.

In 2 Kings 23 in the reign of King Josiah who did what was right in the sight of the Lord, discovered that the word of the Lord the BIBLE was forgotten and that the Kingdom wasn't doing what the Lord really wanted of them. What if that is us today? What if we've completely forgotten what the WORD OF THE LORD tells us how we are supposed to live our lives. What should our reaction be??

I think that our world is dangerously close, if we aren't already there to being very much like the Kingdom of Jerusalem in 2 Kings. We let the thoughts and opinions of man reign in our lives rather then the life breathing word of God. How does that grieve the Lord? How am I grieving the Lord? How are we grieving the Lord?

I seriously want a community of believer's that will follow after the Lord so hard and that look upon the face of the Lord so much that we begin to be transformed into his likeness. That isn't selfish with each other that we want the Lord's best for everyone that is close to our hearts that when the Lord calls them away from that community we will commission them in the full power of the Holy Spirit and send them out in power!

GOD BREAK OFF EVERY CHAIN THAT IS KEEPING YOUR BRIDE FROM STEPPING INTO HER TRUE IDENTITY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mohyR5xowFw

Well all that to say, I was able to step back into my true purpose.. I had the immense honor of leading the Junior High Ministry at Missions Hills Church's annual missions trip to Norwood Colorado. We've been going to this small rural community for 30 years and serving the community by putting on Vacation Bible Studies in these towns. I in particular led a team to Paradox CO which is about 15 minutes east of the Utah state border. I co-lead this team with a couple from Guatemala who said that this town looks worse then many towns in Guatemala a third world country. So that should give you some idea of the state of things in Paradox. My team and I put on a vacation bible school where most of the kids are being raise by grandparents because their parents are working out of state or work from 4 am to 10 pm to provide a living for their families or have left their children with their parents never to see them again and in most extreme circumstances are in prison. We provided a safe place for these children with a safe place where they can be kids. When we arrived these children were as down trodden as their circumstances were. But we saw the LIGHT of the LORD break into these kids lives, where they were able to experience joy and to be kids.

I am so proud of every member of my team! They loved the snot out of these kids. They were able to gain a heart for the kids of this community in ways that they hadn't expected and that I hadn't expected either. We also had the opportunity to do a prayer walk around the town and my Junior High kids were weeping for the lost kids of Paradox, for the people of Paradox, for a place where there was no life and no hope. But what makes me immensely proud instead of wallowing in the depression that had a firm grip on this community they DECLARED LIFE AND HOPE over this town. It's enough to make me break down and cry right now, but I won't because I am sitting in a coffee shop and that would just be weird.

They saw the power of the spiritual strongholds in this town. In a small town of probably 200+ people that's a generous estimate there are two mormon churches. One of them happens to be in a former Christian Church that closed when the pastor moved on from that community. In addition to all of the other things that we were able to see with our eyes.

We saw five children out of the 14 accept Jesus as their LORD! I REJOICE IN THE WAY that the Lord used my team to reach these children! But I urgently plead with you to pray for these five precious lives. There is no church in Paradox to connect them with, the nearest church is about 45 minutes away even the christian kids in the town already rarely get to go to church. So there isn't a lot of chance to follow up with these kids and to disciple them.

Then Jesus called for the children and said to the disciples, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.n

Luke 18:16-17

Jesus wants these children to know him in an intimate way and he wants this for all of us. But why do we let this become okay that they kids don't get discipled or that we as adults or whoever is reading this blog to have a deep personal relationship that goes beyond sitting in a pew on a sunday morning not really engaging in a real living faith!

I praise GOD for the way that he worked in the lives of my students and in the community of Southwestern Colorado. But it becomes very evident to be that the harvest truly is plenty but the workers are few!

PARADOX TEAM: You truly have become missionaries. But you haven't left the missions field, your schools and even our church is a missions field to have people experience the love of God that has transformed your lives. He transformed your lives this week in large ways praise him for that and never forget that! I love every single one of you!!!!

GOD SEND YOUR WORKERS!!!!! SEND YOUR LABORS!!!!!! GOD WAKE UP YOUR WARRIOR BRIDE THAT WANT'S TO CLAIM LIVES FOR YOUR KINGDOM!!!!!!

Wondering ramblings... weighted thoughts...

2011-04-23T21:18:00.000-07:00

This is an anniversary that haven't been looking forward too in the least, so much so that it's passed completely and I ignored it an didn't even acknowledge that it happened. It's so difficult to put words to what I've gone through the past year. Some of it good, some a lot of it not good but totally needed. Before I get into the wondering rambling as it is titled let me explain. A year ago I left Hawaii and I left YWAM to come home to Colorado because that's what I felt that the Lord wanted me to do even if right now in the midst of this season I can't for the life of me remember why.

In YWAM people and friends become so close that they are your family. Not that your genetically related family are insufficient, but you open yourself up to these people that you live with in such a way that is very hard to explain. You spend two to three years getting to know these people and friend and have your heart wrenched out when they leave your life. In YWAM you start and stop staff or schools at different times so people are constantly transitioning out of your life and it sucks! Not poetic but true! Then moving back home out of that environment all of those people are suddenly out of your life. You try and maintain contact with them but their world is wrapped up in the wonderful thing that God has for you. So that connection fades...

Even though Hawaii is part of America the culture however is anything but that. It's unique and beautiful pair that with the culture that is produced while you are with YWAM it creates something amazing. But I return to the mainland and am expected to conform in this way or that way. From the way I look to the way I look at life get judged. It's wearing and tearing me apart some days.

I've spent the better part of a year looking for a job. I go through 2-4 interview per job making it to the final selection between myself and another and probably about 50 times on the minimum and every single time they go with the other person. How many times can people take rejection time after time. Yet I still go out time after time applying for jobs and taking interviews.

I remember the first blog I posted having moved back to the mainland... I said that I felt the gentle whisper of the Lord working on my character but that gentle whisper has felt like it's turned into a shouting match. I want to stay the course of the plans that the Lord has for me, yet it's difficult to maintain when I feel so discouraged from every angle.

Ultimately I know my failing, the thoughts and opinions of man have way to much weight in my life right now. I need to allow myself to be drawn deeper into the presence of the Lord where I can only hear his voice. I guess it's just a matter of focusing on his voice.

The longing of my heart is to return to YWAM doing exactly what I love to do but right now I just don't know if that's in the cards. I give that longing to the Lord knowing that he has the best in store for me even when I can't see it. My character overhaul continues... I want to be found faithful!

Thanks for letting me vent, I didn't realize that I had bottled this up for so long!

To Whom it May Concern - Regarding the American Nightmare...

2011-02-16T10:57:00.001-08:00

So the title of this blog is a search for relevance... What does that even mean? As a person of the generation Y we're looking for meaning in our lives. Proof that our lives were of consequence. But ultimately it comes down to a question of identity and is that identity firmly and securely placed in Jesus. So that is my search for relevance, that I would have an identity that is known as a friend of God. That every fiber of my being would be dependent of God rather then the things of man. However that is simply not how the American world works, we are dependent on the facts and the facts of society are that there isn't enough room for God...

Wait a minute... If we claim that we are Christians shouldn't he be the NUMBER ONE PRIORITY in our lives? Okay so how do we make him the number on priority in our lives. By applying the TRUTH of his word in our lives. As Christians I believe that we tend to just try to live out the passages the pertain to sin and call it good. But guess what that's not good enough, we're called to TRUST! Proverbs 3:5-6 talks about that... I love the way that the English Contemporary Version puts it.

With all your heart

you must trust the LORD

and not your own judgment.

Always let him lead you,

and he will clear the road

for you to follow.

It makes an emphatic statement right there... With all your heart trust the Lord and not your own judgement. We don't have an option an emphatic statement is that we trust. Are we trusting God with our futures? Our finances? Our relationships? Our Children? Our jobs? Our lives? Have we minimized the power and might of God in light of worry or trouble?

Hello???? Wake up? We shouldn't, heck what are all these songs that we teach our children and they believe them shouldn't we??

He's got the whole WORLD in his hands?

We teach that God has everything under control. Guys, it's really time that we started believing it! I get it life is hard... Heck my life has been hard too. However:

JAMES 1:2 Consider it pure joy my brothers when you face trials of many kinds!

There's a song by Jesus Culture that describes it perfectly

Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails

I know I still make mistakes
But You have new mercies for me everyday
Your love never fails

Chorus:
You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning

And when the oceans rage
I don't have to be afraid
Because I know that You love me
Your love never fails

Verse 2:
The wind is strong and the water's deep
But I'm not alone in these open seas
Cause Your love never fails

The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails

Bridge:
You make all things work together for my good

If God is for us then who can stand against us? But who is standing against us? The title of this blog is the American Nightmare... I've been in "American culture" for almost a year now and it is a nightmare to me even still... It's all performance based and there is no grace. Success drives us, money motivates us. We have bills to pay - credit cards, car payments, tuition, house payments. We have to have nice cars, nice clothes... But before I get to far let me say that none of these things are bad, they become bad when we make them idols in our lives. When they take the place of God as NUMBER one.

Foxes have dens to live in, and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place even to lay his head. Luke 9:58

Are we creating places for God to make is home in our hearts, in our churches, in our lives? I don't want to wake up and be like King Josiah and discover our world has forgotten about the words of God in it's power and having it be alive and active in our lives. Or maybe this day is already upon us in the Temple of the Lord there were idols that were placed on equal status to God.

My heart cry is for REVIVAL to be awakened in the global body of Christ. That we would take to the streets and claiming lives for the Kingdom.

He said to his disciples, "The harvest is great, but the workers are few. Matthew 9:37

We think that when a pastor gives an alter call we are being harvesters, but it's not! There are people who are dying and going to hell because we have kept quiet.

The following is a video made by Penn the illusionist that is known with his partner as Penn and Teller. In the video Penn talks about how at a show he received a bible... basically what I wanted to highlight is at the end of the video... If you believe that you have this truth and that it will change your life and save you from hell. How much do you have to hate me not to share this truth with everyone you meet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdvES4_MJ5Y

I'm just sayin'... How much do we have to hate our friends and family that aren't saved not to share this truth with them.

God's on the move in the world and I want to be a part of it! God is jealous for us and he won't relent until he has it all!!!! Which means all of us every part of our lives! I will spend the rest of my life relenting control to God.

I want my life to be lived as a poured out love offering to him. That may look different then the way you would do it. But don't judge me because of that, I love Jesus and want to serve him will all that I am. Because that's what he deserves is all of us, because that what he gave up for us. So encourage me to keep pursuing God with everything and I want to encourage you to do the same!

Love, Peace, and Abundant Blessings to you all!

To Whom it May Concern - Regarding the American Nightmare...

2011-02-16T10:56:00.000-08:00

With all your heart

you must trust the LORD

and not your own judgment.

Always let him lead you,

and he will clear the road

for you to follow.

JAMES 1:2 Consider it pure joy my brothers when you face trials of many kinds!

There's a song by Jesus Culture that describes it perfectly

Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails

I know I still make mistakes
But You have new mercies for me everyday
Your love never fails

Chorus:
You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning

And when the oceans rage
I don't have to be afraid
Because I know that You love me
Your love never fails

Verse 2:
The wind is strong and the water's deep
But I'm not alone in these open seas
Cause Your love never fails

The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails

Bridge:
You make all things work together for my good

Foxes have dens to live in, and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place even to lay his head. Luke 9:58

He said to his disciples, "The harvest is great, but the workers are few. Matthew 9:37

We think that when a pastor gives an alter call we are being harvesters, but it's not! There are people who are dying and going to hell because we have kept quiet.

The following is a video made by Penn the illusionist that is known with his partner as Penn and Teller. In the video Penn talks about how at a show he received a bible... basically what I wanted to highlight is at the end of the video... If you believe that you have this truth and that it will change your life and save you from hell. How much do you have to hate me not to share this truth with everyone you meet.

I'm just sayin'... How much do we have to hate our friends and family that aren't saved not to share this truth with them.

God's on the move in the world and I want to be a part of it! God is jealous for us and he won't relent until he has it all!!!! Which means all of us every part of our lives! I will spend the rest of my life relenting control to God.

I want my life to be lived as a poured out love offering to him. That may look different then the way you would do it. But don't judge me because of that, I love Jesus and want to serve him will all that I am. Because that's what he deserves is all of us, because that what he gave up for us. So encourage me to keep pursuing God with everything and I want to encourage you to do the same!

Love, Peace, and Abundant Blessings to you all!

Clearing away the dust...

2010-10-03T19:42:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been since may that I last posted anything on this ol' blog. So I figured that it was about time to clear away the dust that had settled over here. Well I find that I have fully transitioned back to Colorado - although there are still little things that I find weird like wearing socks for the first time in two years. Wow that's weird! I've been home about six months and when meeting people I find that I can no longer say I just got back from Maui.

This place has often been a place where I can express some more of my more radical thoughts. It still very much is. There's a saying in YWAM that you are ruined for the ordinary. That statement is VERY true to me. I am ruined for the ordinary things of life and of this world. The difficult thing about being home and it's needless to say the most difficult thing is the way that people view my life and the expectation that they have of me. There's often disappointment or a critique that frequently forms on their lips.

But I take heart in the fact that I am called by God to be doing what I am doing! I am following hard after the voice of the Lord and his will for my life. Think about how many times you ask the Lord to bless this thing or that thing in your life. But instead what if we were blessed simply because we were walking out the will of the Lord.

We live in a culture where the opinions of people reign supreme in our lives they have to power to build us up or tear us down. More often then not it tends to be the later. Why then are we dependent on such voices why do men have more power and authority then our sovereign Lord.

I am tired of people looking at my life and seeing the Lord as the excuse in my life when he is the reason for it! WOW! The power of that statement just washed all over me!

Jesus let me see your eyes, let me feel your embrace, let me feel you all around me!

I was made for, I was made for, I was made for LOVE!

GOD I PRAISE YOU FOR I AM WONDERFULLY AND FEARFULLY MADE!

--{Made for Encounter}--

2010-05-27T10:54:00.000-07:00

We weren't made to be satisfied with encounter with the Lord. We were made to desire as much encounter with the Lord as we can get!

The Lord gave me revelation of that very idea and concept. I don't ever want to come seeking the presence of the Lord to be satisfied. I desire intimacy with the Lord above all else and that is what I seek, that's what I long for. It's a desire that can never be satisfied because I serve an infinite God that will continue to fill me up and continue to allow me to draw closer to Him. To be overwhelmed by the goodness of the Lord.

Cory Asbury has a song called "Where I Belong" it rings with our desire to be with the Lord. To know and experience the place where we belong:

Your presence is all I am longing for

Here in the secret place

Your nearness is all I am waiting for

Here in the quiet place,

Here in the secret place

My soul waits for You alone

Like the watchmen wait for dawn

Here I’ve finally found the place

Where we’ll meet, Lord, face to face

Chorus 1:

I’ve finally found where I belong,

I’ve finally found where I belong in Your presence

I’ve finally found where I belong,

To be with You, to be with You

Chorus 2:

I am my Beloved’s and He is mine,

So come into Your garden and take delight in me

Take delight in me

Bridge:

Delight in me, delight in me

Delight in me, delight in me

Tag:

Here in Your presence, God, I find my rest

Here in Your presence, God

We were made for the presence of the Lord to encounter him. Yet why do we always manage to seek lesser lovers. He is our sovereign God and he demands all of us if he choose to serve him. I am overwhelmed by the presence of God, by spending time with my friend, lover, and savior. I want to live a Psalm 27 lifestyle where the one thing I want is to spend time with the Lord. All else pales in comparison to that, nothing and no one else matter's except the Lord. To follow with reckless abandon, to have ruthless trust in my God!

A semblance of sanity...

2010-05-10T12:29:00.000-07:00

Well the main purpose and identity of this blog is changing for a season much the same way that I am. It was used to inform people of the comings and goings of my ministry, which is still very true. But in addition to that, to try and grasp just what the title of this post say, to gain... a semblance of sanity. So much seems to be happening all at once in life right now. I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me trying to keep up with this fast pace lifestyle that the rest of the world seems to be running along at.

We always try for the bigger and better thing. But the thing that grieves me is that we have the ability to look upon the biggest and the best thing. But do we ever take the time to do that, to sit and be still before the Lord. In preparing myself for my bible study this week I just really wanted to seek the Lord and see what was on his heart for this week. He brought to mind Psalm 27:4 to mind immediately

"The one thing I ask of the LORD--the thing I seek most--is to live in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, delighting in the LORD's perfections and meditating in his Temple."

As an intercessor this verse is often my prayer for my life. Praying that verse into my life looks very different in this new season of my life. There just seems to be so much turmoil in life around me, it's truly overwhelming. I want to scream and shout out for the Lord to come and redeem these circumstances. For his spirit of revival to fall on those around me who I dearly love. But circumstances are not bigger then God, do they control his actions, or his character. No. Not even for one second do they do such a thing. So today and for many days to follow I cry "The one thing I ask of the Lord--the thing I seek most-- is to live in the house of the Lord all of the days of my life, delighting in the Lord's perfections and meditating in his Temple." I want to gaze on the beauty of the Lord, the beauty of my lover that makes everything around him pale in comparison.

God is in control, I am an heir of the most high God. God I submit to you and your control, God your ways aren't mine.

A holding pattern...

2010-05-06T09:11:00.000-07:00

I've been putting off updating this blog for so long, mostly because I cannot believe that I am living on mainland USA. I'd been praying for months and months about what the next season of my life looked like. I've received word after word, and confirmation after confirmation about a change that was going to be happening in my life. So with excitement at the beginning of March I met with the director of our Base and just shared with what the Lord was prompting in my life and in my heart. Just even more to show God and his faithfulness my base director released my to pursue the next season of my life. I left Maui on the 22nd of March for Kona to stay with my awesome friends John and Joyce Kim. I was able to spend time with their school and was blessed by the ministry of David Sliker - one of the end times speakers at IHOP. My time on that island was far too short, and I anxiously look forward to when I'll be able to return to Kona.

After my week in Kona I returned to Denver Colorado where my parents are based. Most of the words and confirmations I had received where about serving with YWAM Kona. Yet in returning to Colorado, I felt the Lord move me into a holding pattern. The Lord has begun to work on my character in ways that I haven't really been able to see yet. But I can feel the gentle ache of what the Lord's already begun. I wish I could say that I enter this season excited and thrilled. Honestly though show me one person that is eager to have their character worked on and I'll show you a BIG FAT Liar! But this is what the Lord has for me in this next season.

Even though I'm not in "full-time" ministry, I still am in full time ministry in my mind. I'm meeting a discipling a couple college guys, I'm going to begin working with the High School ministry at my home church which I've gone to my entire life. In addition to that I've been invited to start an intercessory prayer ministry in the high school group. I'm also starting to meet and having conversations with two mormon missionaries about what the believe. I've also begun leading a bible study with a group of friends discussing the importance of revival. I'm content with the season I'm in right now, because that's what the Lord has for me. I still feel a prompting not to forget my YWAM roots and am thrilled for the season in which to Lord returns me to active participation in YWAM again.

Right now one of my constant friends have been books. Right now one my most constant companions are the works of Charles Finney. Through his works I've seen God's heart cry for his bride. It's also been a shocking wake up call to see the state of the bride as well!

So this is the holding pattern of this revivalist!

How willing is willing???

2010-02-03T11:35:00.000-08:00

There it is... the big question. It's out there and how will we respond. I'm not just talking about a general willingness. But I am speaking of the willingness to do what God asks of us even if it's difficult or uncomfortable. Going off of my last post are we willing to die to self? Die to our selfish nature, our entitlement, our plans.

The Lord has been challenging me with MY plans. I hate to use this example because it because growing up I am soooo guilty of doing this with my own parents. But for example you're a teenager and you have plans and your running out the door and you mention in passing what your doing to your parents not seeking the permission or approval. You know that your going to get called back before you can grab your keys and get out the door. I (and I'm willing to bet the vase majority of you) do this with God, I've got my plans and what I want to do. Yeah sometimes I'll go to God and say can I do this. Because he delights in me the Lord will of course say yes.

Lately the song "No Sacrifice" by Jason Upton has really been speaking to me a ton. Here are the lyrics:

To you I give my life, not just the parts I want to

To you I sacrifice these dreams that I hold on to

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

To you I give the gifts

Your love has given me

How can I hoard the treasures that you've designed for free?

Because

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is staronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

To you I give my future

As long as it may last

To you I give my present

To you I give my past

Because

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

I want to live with this willingness to walk out the plans of the Lord not just my plans. But I want to ask the Lord everyday what he wants for my life. I have my plans but HOW MUCH GREATER are the plans of the Lord. Jeremiah 29:11 screams this "For I know the plans I have for you so declares the Lord." It's not the difference between Calvinist and Arminiansts, it's respecting and honoring the sovereignty of God in our own lives, in my life!

The Lord may call some of us to bold faith. In the word it says with faith like a mustard seed you can move mountains! With faith like that mountains bow down before then name of God. But when it comes to trust God with the little like our money, knowing that God will provide for us we shrink back and cower and question the Lord. What would happen if we chose to actually live boldly and asked the Lord what he wanted for our lives. Then.... Wait for it... We actually did it!

Why won't we do this for our King? Because of fear of man, I am determined that public opinion in America is Satan's strongest tool against the church. Why won't we share our faith with our neighbors or the people we meet on the street. Because we're worried about how we will be looked at. "I can't do that because it will effect my relationship with my neighbors." YES IT WILL the power of Christ will cause you to have a radically different relationship with your neighbors. Our faith isn't something to be lived outside of the church and family. WRONG!

God I want to say yes to whatever you have for me. I want to live my life with radical obedience to you! I will forsake all things, all people to follow after you!

Dying to self... but do you really mean it!

2010-01-23T19:06:00.000-08:00

To my adoring blog followers I find that it has been far to long once again. I've been away from the medium for more then a month. crazy. Well December 3rd happened I finally went home for the first time in a year. It was definitely needed and I didn't even realize it! I was lucky enough to be about to stay home for an extra two weeks before I came back to Maui. It was a sweet time with friends and family. So refreshing.

Over break I started reading some of the Christian's Mystics - Charles Finney, Madam Guyon, Brother Lawerence. I was very heavily impacted by all of their words. They speak of dying to self in a way that I never thought of. Or maybe wasn't ready revelation of that scope. But when we think of dying to self we let little bits of self stay and remained anchored. But if we are truly dead to self we are not entitled to anything other then what God has for us. So as American's the most entitled people this comes as a big pill to swallow. I'm no different, I have plans things that I would love to come to fruition. But I'm called to lay them down before the Lord. So I'm entering into a unique season when I'm letting God completely dictate my life. I am at his beck call. I am not my own I was bought at a price. Becoming a bondslave to christ.

BAHHHHHHHH....

2009-11-27T10:43:00.000-08:00

That scream was real and filled with excitement! Thanksgiving has come and gone and that means that I'll be back in Denver in less then a week! I'm so excited it's my first trip home in a year and my first vacation in a year too! I am realizing how much I need to take a break so it's going to be amazing to see all of you guys in Colorado and just to have a break!

I've begun just to think about the things about home... That gets me really excited! Seeing my family, sleeping in my own room, one thing that I loved last year at home was quite times at Starbucks!

I'm praying against reverse culture shock through... It can be hard to be off the island and out of YWAM. I am really excited to step off that plane into the cold embrace of DENVER!!! BAHHHHHHHHH... I have six days left and they are going to be long! I pray that they go by sooo FAST!

I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and I'll be seeing you soon!

The Lord is on the move...

2009-11-17T12:19:00.000-08:00

I know that it's been a week or so since I've updated my blog. My most sincere apologies for that. The Lord has been doing a lot in my life over the past couple of weeks. I will share this in the weeks to come, when I can come to a place where I can share it! Yet through this I have been impacted once again how much I need to trust the Lord with my whole life. It's kind of like when I've learned to trust God in one area of my life I forget about trusting him in another or I'm shown how incomplete the trust I had was. I've learned to trust the Lord with my finances, but I've realized how little I trusted the Lord with my future.

How I've want to have control of it, even though I say that I want to do His will in my life instead of mine. But when the Lord asks us to do something that goes against our plans or what we expect are we faithful to actually do it or do we drag out feet. Or act out of a spirit of fear! That same spirit of fear has been prevalent in my life because of what the Lord's doing in my life! It went against the grain of my plans!

I want to serve the Lord the best that I can, and that means trusting the best that the Lord has for me!

The Summer DTS has just returned from outreach and the spirit they bring to the base is amazing! The Lord has done so much in their lives... I love looking at their lives and seeing the fingerprints of God so evident in their lives! They are a walking testimony of the Lord and the works of his hands!

Thank you for your support and your prayers! I would ask for prayer for more increase in my monthly support! If you read this I would challenge you to pray about partnering with me monthly! Don't think that it has to be some huge amount even five dollars a month would be such a blessing to me!

Forgotten God....

2009-10-27T13:23:00.001-07:00

I start this post off asking for prayer for the ministry of YWAM Maui. This past weekend our Summer School/Winter School, school leader Tik Pimpang from Thailand was deported from the USA. The last time that she was deported it took her a year to get back to the states. It is our prayer that she would be able to get back in time to lead the Winter School. Which starts in January. So it's my request along with the rest of YWAM Maui that you who read this would intercede for Tik and that the Lord's will would be done in this situation. Mahalo.

I wanted to share this week about what I'm learning. This past Sunday I picked up a book by Francis Chan called the Forgotten God - Reversing our tragic neglect of the Holy Spirit. I found that I resonated a lot with what Chan writes. His style was impacting and comical. At one point in the book when making reference to the day of Pentecost Chan says, "He tells His disciples to stay in Jerusalem and wait for the Holy Spirit. (The disciples obey because that's what people do when someone rises from the dead and gives instructions)" I found that line very comical in fact it was the first time I laugh out loud at a book.

But even more then that one of the things that Chan discusses in the book is the dichotomy between the views of the Jesus' disciples and us today. The disciples were use to having Jesus with him interacting so when the Holy Spirit came they were hungry and ready for it. But with us we would probably much more prefer to have Jesus in the flesh interacting with us. But that's not how it works. Jesus even said it was better for them and us that he went away so that he could send his helper the Holy Spirit. In that interaction making our interaction with the Trinity complete. What another amazing gift of Jesus death on the cross.

We serve an unchangeable God, he stays the same yesterday, today, tomorrow, forever. So that means that the God of the bible is still the God of today. So the power of God is unchanged, and is unchangeable, why then do we try and change God, why do we explain away the power of God. Are we afraid? Do we see people who have abused power? Do they seem for lack of a better word crazy? Why do we let people shade our experiences of God?

I come before the Lord seeking more of him, not for my own glory but to see his name praised more and more. To draw people closer to himself rather then me. The limitless power of God has been made available to those who seek him. It's time that I started taking the Bible and God at his word and believed the things that are said there.

He no longer calls us servants but calls us sons! That is our identity, our destiny is heaven, our call is to bring HEAVEN to EARTH!

Let us live and walk out in the truth of the word and the power of the spirit. Truth doesn't get more truer, it's one dimensional, it gains dimension with the relationship with God, with the Holy Spirit, Father, and Son. WALK OUT IN THE POWER OF GOD, that has transformed our lives, that has transformed my life.

We are called to be radically different for the kingdom of God and it's high time that you and I started living like it.

Weighted...

2009-10-17T22:51:00.000-07:00

I know that I have already posted an update for this week, but I've been walking around aimlessly and restlessly all night. I feel WEIGHTED. The reason for feeling this way is so easy to address and discover. The church that I go to New Hope Maui, is a small impassioned body of believer's. It is so dear to my heart and I love it so much! One thing about New Hope is that most of the people that attend New Hope are recovering drug and alcohol addicts. The Lord's grace is really felt in this church. What feels so weighted about that? Most of these individuals also have children and teenager's. They have felt the weight of their parents decisions, to live a life style of drugs and alcohol.

Recently I was asked along with the DTS students that attend the church, to start a youth group for 9th and 10th graders. We meet for the first time last week... To say it was difficult would very much be an understatement. These guys weren't disruptive as one might assume, they were quiet. We were with them for 2 hours and only in the last 15 minutes did they start opening up to us. I realized then that we would have our work cut out for us. Not because they were bad kids, but because they didn't know the Lord the way that I or my student know him. The reason that these kids are mostly shut off or hard to reach are simply their circumstances. The circumstance ranges from having a father in prison, a father dead and a range of other things.

I realized that we would need to approach this the way that I did when I was a Young Life leader (younglife.org). We needed to earn the right to be heard.

Part of the reason that I feel WEIGHTED is because our students were excited at the prospect of what we were doing, but they were also very aware of the limited time they had with them to make a difference. I too also realized that five weeks wasn't very long. But tonight the Lord is convicting my heart because HE IS IN MY! THAT MEANS THAT HE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD!

I've mentioned here previously some of the stuff that the Lord was taking me through was to stop looking at my circumstances, because they take my eyes off of God. I got bogged down by my circumstances with these youth!

Right now my blood feels on fire as the Lord reminds me of my vision for my life, the call that he has for my life!

"To see a generation of young people be raised up to cultivate and encounter the presence of the Lord. To disciple these youth in the marriage of truth and spirit, so they can change the world for Christ!"

This is what I do, this is what the Lord has called me too. I am excited, more excited then the words of this blog can convey! This is why I need all of you to partner with me. So that I can continue to do what the Lord has called me to do, but also to challenge you who read these words that you CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN SOMEONE'S LIFE BECAUSE OF WHAT THE LORD HAS DONE FOR YOU!

So please pray as I press into the Lord to make a difference in these students lives, both the DTS students and the youth group at New Hope.

I count it an honor and a privilege to serve both God and you out here in Maui and in the Nations!

Blessings, and Mahalo!

Truly, Truly, BLESSED BEYOND MEASURE!!!

2009-10-15T10:28:00.000-07:00

Alright so I have been waiting to post because the Lord has really been rocking me and I have been waiting to see how far it would go. So this is why I am truly blessed beyond measure.

So to start at the beginning, our leader's at YWAM International decided that we as a mission should memorize some scripture. The scripture is Philippians 1:18 - 2:27

" Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, and not frightened in anything by your opponents. This is a clear sign to them of their destruction, but of your salvation, and that from God. For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, engaged in the same conflict that you saw I had and now hear that I still have.

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Lights in the World
Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.
Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world,holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me."

It's amazingly powerful the scope of these verses. As I begun to unpack them I was struck hard at do I really consider other's more important then myself. In our growth group (bible study/accountability) we talked about how when we go through out our day we are usually looking for something from ourselves rather then what God wants to do through us through the day.

So I really started to think about my prayer life and the little selfish prayers that I have. I am presenting my requests before the Lord, but what has been my motivation behind the prayers. I realized that it was often very selfish what I've been praying! So I simply said to the Lord that I didn't want to pray selfishly anymore. This is where amazing break through has happened in my life!!!

The very next day after I told God this. I get an email from someone who read my blog off of YWAM Maui's website telling me that she felt like God was telling her to become a monthly supporter. I was in complete disbelief, utter shock! God moved because I humbled myself. Then it continued I got another email from a girl in my SBFM (School of Biblical Studies and Missions) saying that she also wanted to support me!

God has truly blessed me beyond measure!

This week in the DTS our former base Directors Vince and Lesa McClung are here teaching. The topic for this week is New Hearts, Vince and Lesa take the students through past hurts and really minister to the students! It's an awesome week of lecture and can be very emotional. So please keep the DTS students in your prayers this week!

Also I wanted to thank you for praying for the couple with our SBFM. We now have a Nanny in place for them! This is such a blessing to the Family, but also to the rest of us as a base. In order to make sure that the kids were taken care us all the departments had to make sacrifices of staff or mission builders to help out. We were glad to do it, but it meant lots more work for everyone! But now we have a nanny in place that is amazing! PRAISE GOD!

I am unbelievably blessed to be working in such a place as this! Thank you for your prayers and support! If you are interested in joining me in ministry here at YWAM Maui please contact me @ luke.m.sexson@gmail.com

I love you all and am extremely blessed by each of you!

Uncreative...

2009-10-05T13:18:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately I was feeling quite uncreative for my blog title... So it reflects as such! I wanted to share what God's been up to lately in my life and in the lives of others around me. As I live, work and serve here at YWAM Maui, I've realized the importance of having vision. First to have the vision of YWAM Maui where I serve but also to have vision for my own life.

I am beginning to realize that my vision that God has given me, isn't yet complete God keeps adding little bits here and there to it. Nevertheless I am realizing that in all likelihood I will be serving within YWAM Maui longer then two years. While that excites me so much to continue doing the work of the Lord, it also make me nervous because my finances don't reflect that goal either. I have confidence that if the Lord is calling me here to YWAM Maui that he will provide and make a way.

So for all of my followers on this blog, I would request that you pray that the Lord makes a way. If you feel led to help in that way, please contact me at luke.m.sexson@gmail.com

Thank you soo much for your support and love!

Christmas, Christmas, time is here...

2009-09-22T14:57:00.000-07:00

It's not really... but I just wanted to share with you all that I am the proud owner of a plane ticket to Denver Colorado. I'll be home in Colorado on December 3rd to the 27th. I would love to see anyone who will be in the Denver area and would love to schedule a time to get coffee and hang out and share what the Lord is doing in my life and ministry! In addition to that I am also going to be scheduling an open house that I would love for all of you to come too that will be held at my parents home in Centennial!

Things around Maui are moving at a fast pace! The DTS has started their second week of lecture. They've already been separated in their teams! So it's interesting to see bonds becoming tighter with people that are already on their team. I really am enjoying my position on base right now because it allows me time to pour in and disciple these guys from a friendship perspective! It's awesome to see already how these guys are already learning and growing how they are really being challenged with their faith a lot of them for the first time!

It's already September and I find myself getting very excited for December to be able to come home and catch up with life in Colorado. However I'm not very anxious for the snowy weather that is bound to catch up with me in Colorado!

Thanks so much for your prayer and support, I would be utterly lost with out all that everyone does for my life!

So it begins again....

2009-09-16T10:16:00.000-07:00

Last night we just "officially" welcomed in our new DTS. Pictured above are some of the new guys, Brock, Nick, and Casey KC Douglas Butterfield Niblet (Seriously that's his name). It's an awesome time at any YWAM base when a new school comes in because the Lord is already on the move in their lives. While I may not be going on outreach with these awesome guys and girls. I do however get to impart their lives on a friendship level. I consider it a high honor to do that. Last night I was able to pray for several of the guys and really impart the Lord's heart for this next season that they are entering into.

There is a different flavor coming out of this generation, out of my generation. The hunger and passion for the Lord will change the face of the earth. We just have to encourage it and continue to point in the direction of the Lord! God is doing awesome things in Maui and in the globe. We've just received an update from one of our teams in Bangladesh on outreach. Right now the team is in Thailand, they were able to actually build a bridge in one of the slums in Thailand. They are making a difference by showing the love of Christ to people that don't know. Sometimes practical expressions of showing the love of Christ can be some much more powerful then words can accomplish sometimes!

I love what I am able to do here in Maui and see nations and people changed. I love seeing young adults come in hungry for the Lord and leave with the capability to change the WORLD! I feel like the Lord is leading me to continue on in the ministry for the foreseeable future. Which means I need MORE PRAYER COVERING, and more financial support! So I would ask if the Lord leads that you would pray about partnering in ministry with me! YOU DO MAKE AN IMPACT IN THE WORLD AND IN THE LIVES OF YOUNG PEOPLE! One of YWAM's core values is to be a champion for young people! So I ask that you partner with me in becoming a champion for young people! Please contact me @ Luke.m.sexson@gmail.com

This little guy is my favorite person in the whole world! Israel he's the son of my mentor

2009-09-15T11:51:00.000-07:00

So in recent days I guess, God's really been speaking to me about renewed vision. So in pressing in and renewing the vision that God's given me it's changed or been added to more to say. In it being added to I've felt just an amazing renewal at seeking the Lord for his vision for my life! So this is what the Lord spoke to me:

"To see a Generation of young people be raised up to cultivate and encounter the presence of the Spirit of the Lord and the power of the truth of the Word. To disciple these youth in the marriage of truth and spirit, so they can change the world for Christ! The result will overwhelm the earth having young men and women empowered by the truth and the spirit imparting that to others!"

I love it because the wording in so rich, to cultivate something means it has to be the right time. It takes a lot of work to cultivate the soil so that it's ready to plant. So seeing the hearts, souls, and minds of a generation cultivated to encounter the Lord. No matter what it looks like. But having young people walking out in the power of the spirit and the truth will truly overwhelm the earth!

If you look around the world is changing at a rapid pace. Just this weekend you can see how the media can distort the truth. There was a protest in Washington DC this past weekend. Protesting socialism. Most media that you will read says that there were only a couple thousand people at this protest. 2 Million people were actually there, there's so much subjective relative truth that we are being fed. We have a unique opportunity as Christians to influence our world in such a way to bring change!

Over in Kona on the Big Island I have a number of friends that are hearing the rallying cry and are going and changing the face of the earth with what they are doing. I have one friend that is going on a road trip across America to raise awareness on Human Trafficking on a global level but also to make people aware that it's happening in America as well in large numbers! Here's even what the State Department had to say about Human Trafficking in our own boarders.

"Due to the “hidden” nature of trafficking activities, gathering statistics on the magnitude of the problem is a complex and difficult task. The following statistics are the most accurate available, given these complexities, but may represent an underestimation of trafficking on a global and national scale.

Each year, an estimated 600,000 to 800,000 men, women, and children are trafficked across international borders (some international and non-governmental organizations place the number far higher), and the trade is growing. (U.S. Department of State. 2004. Trafficking in Persons Report. Washington, D.C.: U.S. Department of State.)

Of the 600,000-800,000 people trafficked across international borders each year, 70 percent are female and 50 percent are children. The majority of these victims are forced into the commercial sex trade.

Each year, an estimated 14,500 to 17,500 foreign nationals are trafficked into the United States. The number of U.S. citizens trafficked within the country each year is even higher, with an estimated 200,000 American children at risk for trafficking into the sex industry. (U.S. Department of Justice. 2004. Report to Congress from Attorney General John Ashcroft on U.S. Government Efforts to Combat Trafficking in Persons in fiscal year 2003. Washington, D.C.: U.S. Department of Justice.)

The largest number of people trafficked into the United States come from East Asia and the Pacific (5,000 to 7,000 victims). The next highest numbers come from Latin America and from Europe and Eurasia, with between 3,500 and 5,500 victims from each. (U.S. Departments of Justice, Health & Human Services, State, Labor, Homeland Security, Agriculture, and the U.S. Agency for International Development. 2004. Assessment of U.S. Government Activities to Combat Trafficking in Persons. Washington, D.C.: U.S. Department of Justice.)

And that is happening in our own country!

Then I have another friend that is going on a trip to the Ivy Leagues on the East Coast. All of these schools have a common thread; that is they all have a biblical foundation, as part of their founding principles. But they have gone very far way from those biblical principles that they were founded on. So they are going to call them back to that foundation, through worship and intercession and building relationships with students and professors.

Like I said things are changing in the world at a rapid pace. All you have to do is turn on the news to see that blaring fact. But we as Christians can point this change in the direction towards Christ. I love having supporters because it's people like you all that can come a long side me in prayer and support!

Something else that God has really been speaking to me as well is this, what I'm doing goes far beyond two years. This is a lifestyle for me, and I need your help and support to continue doing what the Lord has called me to do to. To disciple young people to change the world for Christ! It sounds so simple but as I continue here the Lord adds a little bit more to it and a little bit more! I love it. So I would ask that you would pray about joining me in what God's doing in Hawaii and all over the Globe! Contact me if you have any questions! Luke.m.sexson@gmail.com

Being Counter Cultural...

2009-09-09T21:24:00.000-07:00

I love what the Lord is teaching me in this season! Right now I am really learning to be counter cultural. That phrase is very different. What I mean by that is our culture puts a certain amount of expectations and ideas on how we are suppose to live our lives. I look at the faith of those in the bible and I am envious because it seems so easy. I think that I wish faith like that could still exist, but I know that, that is a lie of our culture. We can have faith like that, I mean where in the bible does it say that in the days that we live in today our faith will be so small. Jesus even says that we will do greater things. If we are aware of these great things we will need a larger then life faith!

So that's why I want to live a counter cultural life style. I want to cultivate the presence of Jesus Christ where ever I go, who ever I with. I want the glory of the Lord to shine through me, not because of anything that I am doing but because God's presence has drawn near. In a lot of things that we do we put God in a box. We can't put him there, because he is infinite and cannot be contained. However that doesn't mean that we don't put our him there in our minds. To make him manageable! I don't want that I want as much of the Lord as I can get! I want a one thing desire, where he is my source.

I'm also being shown how much of an idol my circumstances are. What do I mean by that, every time I worry about this or that, where money is coming from. I effectively switch my focus from the Lord to my circumstance. I want to look on the Lord all of his glory and splendor. God is much more attractive then my worries and doubt. Come on we are Christians we are called to have a larger then life faith because of what we believe! Let me live, let us live like we know that the truth of who God is will smash every lofty opinion that comes up against it!

God I want more faith, I want to cultivate your presence in my life! I want to encounter you more and more in my life! God I don't just want experiences, I want you LORD! God make me ready to be the man of God who you've called me to be!

Short Seasons, Long Seasons, Good Seasons, Hard Seasons

2009-08-24T20:55:00.003-07:00

Okay so lately I've been trying to get better at updating people back home about the comings and goings of my life here at YWAM Maui. It's been hard for me to try and explain what I do and to communicate it in the best way possible

There are many different seasons that we go through here in YWAM, many on them are amazing times, but some of them are definitely less then that. My life here in Maui is constantly in flux, from the job that I have, the students that I interact with, the friends that I have. That is because when you commit to YWAM you do so for a minimum of two years of being on staff. In that people are committing at different time and so their commitments are up at different times.

Right now our base is losing one of our elders, someone who I consider a spiritual mother and an amazing friend. Maria Daughtry. It sucks... I don't like it or enjoy it. But I'm not God I don't control him or could even come close to doing so. It's amazing to see people like Maria and her husband Dempsey doing the will and work of the Lord. I'm sad because I loose an awesome friend and mentor.

It makes me think about going home and starting some other kind of ministry, but I know that's not what God has called me to do. So I must be faithful to wait upon the Lord and serve here the best that I can. I am in need of so much prayer and support, so if God lays it on your heart would you pray for me and pray about joining my ministry here in Hawaii.

Why...

2009-08-22T23:34:00.000-07:00

So lately it seems that I've had a lot of why questions floating around in my head. One of them that I have been battling with for weeks is, there seems to be this dividing line that has been drawn in the sand. It separates us in the Christian faith making us look at others in the same faith and wonder at their salvation. I have felt completely caught in the middle of this line, that at times can seem like it's a huge war being waged very reminiscent of the civil war. Let me give voice to this monumental question that it raging in my synapses right now. TO ME it seems like our faith has a problem with either or, meaning it has to be this way or that way. Specifically it has to be either the power of the spirit, or the power of the truth it cannot be both.

I think that we have arrived at this conclusion in our faith to avoid creating syncretists. Meaning taking truth from one religion or belief and combining them with another. Buddhism often prescribes to this way of thought. But what I speak of it a far cry from this, I think that we have relegated this dividing line to an infinite God, or more our perceptions of God and who he is. The conservatives in Christianity believe in the power and truth of the word. Then the charismatics believe in the power and truth of the Spirit. Each side engaging in a verbal sparing match as to which side is right because it's either or it cannot be both. But then we realize that we've put this label on an infinite God. Look at how ridiculous that sounds, WE have put a LABEL (a definition, a term of understanding, etc.) on an infinite God! God is infinite, he can both and, he can be both and, and more. God did inspire the word, so of course there is power in that, but by the same fact God did give us the power of the spirit.

My question is why is it, either or, instead of both and! I feel as if I am caught in some kind of civil war, a war that rages deciding the outcome of service to God. I want to live in both camps, I want to see a marrying of these two schools of thought. Think of the community that could be formed if we run hard after God with this goal in mind. Worship him in Spirit and in Truth. But that's not what happens instead we draw lines and we shout at fellow believer's till we're blue in the face. It's over things like who preaches a better word, or whose worship is better or what prayer is suppose to look like. This thing inhibit us from serving God truly, these ideas we have about religion have formed the ideas that we see God as and it's not okay. I'm not saying this from as some guy trying to rattle the ideas of contention in the world. Well that's only part of that reason, but there is someone much more learned then me, and let's be honest has a far better reputation then I. If both sides are Christians, whose right, which is the right path to go down? So whose idea of God is righter?

“Wrong ideas about God are not only the fountain from which the polluted waters of idolatry flow; they are themselves idolatrous. The idolater simply imagines things about God and acts as if they were true.

Perverted notions about God soon rot the religion in which they appear. The long career of Israel demonstrates this clearly enough, and the history of the Church confirms it. So necessary to the Church is a lofty concept of God that when that concept in any measure declines, the Church with her worship and her moral standards decline along with it. The first step down for any church is taken when it surrenders its high opinion of God.

Before the Church goes into eclipse anywhere there must first be a corrupting of her simple basic theology. She simply gets a wrong answer to the question, ‘What is God like?’ and goes on from there. Though she may continue to cling to a sound nominal creed, her practical working creed has become false. The masses of her adherents come to believe that God is different from what He actually is, and that is heresy of the most insidious and deadly kind.”

So regardless of whose right or wrong, we both are looking at a wrong picture of God, and I agree with AW Tozer in his book Knowledge of the Holy, saying it's idol worship. If we aren't worshiping the truest picture of God, are we truly worshiping God at all? So I can't dare live an either or lifestyle, it has to be both and because I believe in the power of the spirit and the power of the word. I am done fighting and being judged for it. No longer will either side try and sway me this way or that way! I'm on God's side, not conservative, or charismatic, I will have faith that I serve a great provider, and will serve him with the giftings that he's put in my life, I will also believe in the truth and power of his word.

Getting in a different groove...

2009-08-20T10:44:00.001-07:00

So in being absent from this blog for a couple months, I decided that I need to get into some new habits. So with that being said I am going to try and update this a couple times a week. I want it to be a place where I can share what the Lord is doing in my life, but also to share in just some of the day to day comings and goings of life here at YWAM Maui.

Today is Thursday, every Thursday here at YWAM Maui we intercede for something that's been put on the heart of one of our staff. Whether it's a situation, country, people group, a global event, we come together as a base and try and get God's heart for it. These have been some of the most powerful times of prayer I've ever been a part of. I remember last year when the conflict with Russia and Georgia was happening. We as YWAM Maui felt led to pray for them, and I was so moved by the Holy Spirit to what was happening in that country that I was a sobbing mess on the floor. It's amazing to see prayer lived out in such a different way here. We pray for nations, people, governments, or even ourselves, but we pray expecting that we will see a change. I never thought about how my prayer's made a difference. But the prayers of a righteous man are powerful and effecting.

I would encourage you all to start praying for the things that are happening in the world and as for the Lord's heart. Know that your prayers are making a change. Think of how prayer is communicating with God. God is always faithful to answer and move. Come into prayer believing that God will make a difference in the situation. God is all powerful and almighty and so many more things that we never think about or realize. For me it's time that I realized this when I pray!

So on a logistical note, I've been asked to pioneer a new position here at YWAM Maui. The department of transportation and logistics. Basically I arrange and maintain all of the bases vehicles and anything to do with it. It's interesting to start something new. Very similar anywhere else I suppose, if it infringes on past freedoms or the way things have been done before people don't like it. I've encountered a little resistance of that sort in starting this department. But instead of getting angry it's causing me to look at the way that I communicate with people. It makes me think about the way that I say things and how I say them. Sometimes I've gotten so caught up in the logistics of the job that I forget about the people and the relationships that I have with them and those are far more important. Plus it's through those relationships that I am able to make my job easier!

Currently I am reading a book called Connecting by Larry Crabb, it talks about the importance of community and connecting. It doesn't give a formula for it, far from it actually the book shows how we need it. How community and connecting mirrors our relationship with God and the need for it. It's been a perfect book for me, living in community because it's not always easy. Living in Christian community you see the people and place that you live go through different seasons and changes. Sometimes when it's going through one of the harder seasons, you just don't get it and you constantly question why and how. But you have to be long suffering for and through these hard times and seasons of relationships. It's through these hard moments that ultimately define the relationships. It builds the foundations of them.

I think in our American postmodern culture we've become isolated from one another. It is something that we need to fight tooth and nail to stay away from. Even thinking about intercession and praying for each other. How often do we let out pride get in the way from sharing when we need prayer. I can't speak for any of you but it's far to often for myself.

For my I'm challenged to see my life and how I need to connect. Whether it's in prayer, or with people. God calls us to be relational people with himself and others! I challenge all of us even myself to think about that!

Even at the end

2009-08-19T21:52:00.000-07:00

I can't count how many times I've been at the end of my rope... Or what seems like I've been at the end of my rope. But then God brings a heavy conviction to my heart and he reminds me of his glory and his power. I've eluded to some of you being a missionary during a recession isn't the easiest thing. My flesh has risen up and wanted to worry, it's a battle that has been raged and lost and won from time to time. But God is soo good and always provides in the most unexpected ways.

I go to a church on Maui that is far from what America would consider a normal church. It's truly a church where you meet the most unexpected people. Instead of being incredibly vague and cryptic I'll explain more. The name of a church is New Hope Maui, it is located in one of the poorer neighborhoods on Maui called Happy Valley. It is a church full of God's broken ones, where each member has an amazing story of God's redemption and grace. On Maui many people abuse drugs and alcohol, despite the pretty picture that the tourist brochures paint. These are the kind of people that you can encounter when you arrive in the doors of New Hope, people who have a story. There are many prodigal son and daughters at this church. It is what you could call a very poor financially but a very rich church in so many other ways.

Which brings me to my story of how amazing God is even when we think that our circumstances are insurmountable. Our pastor asked me how I was doing and I shared about the uncertain times that we live in and how I felt it as a missionary and he prayed for me. Pastor Dwayne proceeded to get up to bless the offering but before he did he shared his prayers for me. He simply put if anyone felt lead to give to me that they should do so. So during that time one gentleman that attends my church did the holy hand shake and blessed me with a twenty dollar bill. I felt so blessed, that a church that has so little blessed me with what seemed like more then I deserved. The next day our base accountant who does the books for our church as well proceeded to share with me that I didn't just get twenty dollars, but that I received three hundred. I was so humbled by that, God cares and provides for his children in the most unexpected ways that constantly and consistently keep this finite and fallen son on his knees humbled. But the story doesn't end there, the next Sunday, Joanne came up to me again and shared that our pastor added another 200 dollars, and there was more money that hadn't been counted yet.

I sit here before a keyboard electronically pouring out my soul and I'm almost reduced to tears. I worried about money and my financial situation. But God knows exactly what I needed and he's providing it too me in a ultimately humbling way.

So in humbling myself and slaying my pride. If you who read this could be praying for me, that God would continue to be my Jehovah Jireo. That I would learn more trust in God, it is absolutely insane not to trust someone who is infinite when in comparison to me the finite and fallen smuck.

God's also doing so much here at YWAM Maui. Since I've come on staff since last year I've seen five DTS' come through our doors and leave them changed and challenged to influence their world for God. These schools have split into different teams and gone all over south east asia and seen people come to know the Lord. They've seen people they pray for be healed. The Lord's granted them victory when they've engaged in spiritual victory. God's presence is becoming more active and felt in the world.

Even here in Maui, we at YWAM Maui have partnered with an organization called Revival Maui ( http://www.revivalmaui.com). It is a group seeking spiritual revival to come on the island of Maui. Together with them we engage in intercession for the ending of abortion and pornography on Maui. We do this by praying outside Abortion Clinics, Plan Parenthood, and porn shops on island. It has made us less then popular with some, but we've begun to see a shift in the spirit on the island.

YWAM Maui and Revival Maui want to change the culture we live in, in a positive way by interceding and sending young passionate people into the nations.

Finally I've also mentioned here that I've just completed a school called the School of Biblical Foundations and Missions or as we in YWAM call it SBFM. It is an apologetic's worldview school, it's amazing! Being raised in the church you tend to walk around with a faith in faith and it doesn't go beyond it. Not just because it's something that the church encourages but it's the end result for us. This school has caused me to look at the foundations of truth in Christianity and other religions. Now don't be alarmed it wasn't due to some crisis of faith but to think critically about what I believed and take it past something that I was raised with. I now see Christianity as the ultimate truth not just because the people tells so, but in fact because it makes the most logical sense. When compared to all of the other belief systems it is truth, that rises far above anything else out there.

This school changed me outlook sooooo much on life, that I realized that it wasn't just about discipling the youth of the world to change their world. It was only accomplished by discipling them in a biblical worldview that a change can occur.

So I want to close again with a request for prayer for myself and the other amazing people I get to serve the Lord with. But if the Lord stirs your heart to more, I want to personally invite you to engage in ministry with me in anyway that the Lord would lead!

GOD BLESS YOU ALL SOOO MUCH! You all are so important to me and I'm so blessed by all that you guys do!!!
Luke

The loss and a challenge...

2009-05-02T20:33:00.000-07:00

This past Thursday I attended a celebration, a celebration of a great man. Dr Kit Lauer was the pastor of Hope Chapel on of the churches on island that I call my church home. Kit passed away after more then a year of battling an acute form of leukemia. But through that battle I was able to witness Christ being glorified. Kit would still speak at church, but there was a noticeable difference in his preaching style then in any other preacher that I had heard. He didn't have time to mess around, Kit was aware of the circumstances of his life and acted accordingly. Now it sounds extremely cliched to call a funeral a celebration because people usually have to pull from extreme pain in order to make it a celebration. But not this time, myself and the other's from YWAM Maui that attended Kit's funeral were able to sit close to the family due to extreme luck. The Lauer family truly was celebrating their father, brother, and husband's life and his entrance into heaven. People talked about this great man, who with every breath served Christ and went out worshiping him. On the Lauer families faces I hardly ever saw tears - instead I saw smiles as the remembered this extraordinary man.

So what's the walk away from this experience? I left there feeling quite in adequate, realizing that my life wasn't what it should be. I consider myself in a position of full time ministry and I look at my life and how I even live and I'm not doing all that I could. I stay where I am comfortable and I rarely move from that place. I don't do all that I can to express the love of Christ to other's. I thought about my life and when I was in a place that Kit's in now when people are speaking of me. Will they be able to say that this man was a man of God? As much as I would like to say yes, in the honest truth I would truly have to say no. Not to say that I am a horrible person and that I have a list of sin's that are waiting to catch up with me. People could gloss over the positive sides of my character. But am I living my life in such away that I am fulfilling the calling that God has put on my life. In everyone's life complacency has just become a regular response to our circumstances unfortunately I am not immune to such complacency. I study the word and I looked at the passion of some of the biblical figures that I've read about my entire life. Do I have that same passion? Do I weep at the states of my life, my people, like Nehemiah.

I get so caught up in thinking about relationship, or what I am going to do with my life. That I rarely focus on the relationship that I have with God. How sad is that? I get so caught up in my life in wanting to do this or that. That I don't focus on the most important relationship that I will ever have! I was at church last night at Hope Chapel and I was sitting with all of my YWAM friends but I realized that I do focus on those relationship too much sometimes because we live in community. I just had to walk away and spend worship with God.

It's so important to trust in the attributes of Christ. But sometimes I associate God in a human context. That he will do something to betray my trust. But I do that every day, every time that I sin. I betray the trust of my best friend. We have to loosen the walls around our heart to trust God. Not because he has done something that makes him untrustworthy, but we/I made that association that God is like everyone else. When He's like no one else and is never going to be except exactly what he means to be.

I want to leave a legacy on this planet, not for leaving a legacy sake. But because I passionately follow God with my every action that I leave an imprint of Christ on what I leave behind. That's what I see when I look at the legacy that Kit Lauer will leave behind. Christ will be exemplified in the memory and teachings of Kit. My life is in adequate but I want and desire a change. I long to be filled with Christ so much that everything I touch leaves an imprint of Christ. I desire to be a servant of God, a friend of God, and a child of God.

I really want to challenge myself that I need to live more fully for Christ everyday. I need to go to sleep thinking about how I gave myself over more to God's plans and purpose for my life. I need to please only God - not please PEOPLE. I get so caught up in the act of people pleasing I rarely ask God what I should do or how I should be. I let my emotions betray me and sweep me away!

To the Glorious Attempt!

2009-04-21T22:54:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of this month I started a course that YWAM Maui offers called the SBFM which stands for School of Biblical Foundations and Missions. Essentially this school is an apologetics and worldview school. This school is really impacting the way that I think about Christianity and the world. Seeing my faith for what it really is rather then my parents faith, I believe that I've had my own faith for a while now but the depth of ownership in that faith is increasing within the two weeks that I have been doing this course already! Anyway the reason for my writing this evening has to do with a particular intercession time that we had this evening. Trevor Hillman our school leader and director of the SBFM asked us to just give thanks to God tonight. With some of the revelation that God's been giving me through the materials that we've been reading have really contributed to how I even give thanks to God. But Trevor asked us to write out our prayers of thanksgiving. Here is the result of those prayers of thanksgiving that I felt lead to share here with you.

God, I'm thankful that I can't fully comprehend you and your fullness. That I couldn't possibly understand you. That I as I come to know you more, the more mysterious and alluring you are. If I did you wouldn't be worth it. If I served you because I understood you it would mean that I had arrived at some point of arrival of understanding. God I 'm thankful that you are, simply you are who you told Moses "I Am, that I Am." Your glorious, you are splendid, you are so many things and even though I try to articulate these words and try to form them in someway that just might bring you the appropriate glory. Every single time I try my words and praises are rags, unworthy and unbecoming of a King. Yet you look at my rags and you view them as riches of greatest value! I love that no matter what I do, no matter what I try, I can't fully comprehend you. That drives me to what to know you more and more. It makes me want to live in such a way that my every thought, my every fiber longs for you.

I'm thankful that you even desire a relationship with me. That your thoughts for me outnumber the stars and the sands of the sea shore! That's only your thoughts for me not even how deeply you love me. That the intimacy you desire is more passionate then a lover. that you see me... you see ME! Not even me appearing before you in my coverings of sin. that I am plainly naked before you, I am exposed in your embrace. That my name is hidden in your heart. That I am found in the middle of your triune identity. That you desire to take me, Luke back to the garden. Where we walked together in the cool of the evening. I am thankful for the attempt to go back to that place. It's impossible for me to do. BUT HERE'S TO THE GRAND AND GLORIOUS ATTEMPT!

Post-Modern Movement...

2009-03-21T17:23:00.000-07:00

Aloha! It seems that time keeps on slipping away from me. The Winter DTS that I am helping lead is leaving on outreach in a little less then a week and they are getting ready to impact the nations! The past three weeks in their lecture phase have been truly some of my favorite. To start we had my mentor Wil Brillinger come and speak to us on World view. Showing how more and more the world is coming to rely on relative truth and how our world view is based on existentialist view of the world - Meaning that your experiences in life give it meaning and purpose. Also showing us the belief systems of other world religions. Then the following week we had the pleasure of having Amy Sollars a school leader from Kona come over and teach on hearing the voice of God. It was amazing! Amy really took the school through every avenue of hearing God's voice that she has come across. We really spent time seeking the Lord and asking to hear His voice! Let's just say the Holy Spirit moved in some pretty awesome ways and became a real comfort to the students that wasn't there before. Then just this past week we had two members of our base leadership team come and speak on competing systems of belief. Tom Osterhus our base director and Trevor Hilman our SBFM director thought on some competing thoughts and camps to Christianity. They taught on Post- Modernism, the Emergent Church, Animism, and Islam.

This week has really opened my eye to see all of the work in the world that Christ still has for us to accomplish! Hearing about these various religions or trains of thought really touched my heart. It also gave me quite the headache trying to get my spirit around some of these trains of thought!

In an effort to broaden my horizon's I've prayed and had the leadership team of YWAM Maui approve my decision to attend our bases apologetics school called the School of Biblical Foundations and Mission short for the SBFM. In a few weeks time I will be moving down to Paia to really seek after the Lord and gain a deeper heart and understanding how to reach the world that we live in!

Thank you so much for your constant support, prayer and LOVE!!!

An adequate update... or at least the appearance of one...

2009-02-01T16:32:00.001-08:00

Time seems to really fly here on the isle of Maui, once again I find myself having to apologize for not appropriately updating... well anyone at all. I was able to travel home in December and spend time with family and friends - if you weren't included in that I am sorry, I'll try better next time and make more time! It was a wonderful time to relax and recover, last quarter on base I ended up with WWAAAAYYYYY to many jobs on base! So I left for Colorado slightly burnt out, but I feel very rejuvenated.

On January 4th I returned to Maui, ready to jump into a new quarter here at YWAM Maui. Around thanksgiving time I was asked if I would intern the upcoming winter DTS. What interning means is you are on DTS staff but you don't go on outreach but you do everything else! It's a very awesome job. Myself along with two others - Mister Joshua Cordy, and Joseph Brunette make up the interns and we join 8 others to make 11 one of the largest DTS Staff we've had at YWAM Maui. So far we've had three weeks of lecture, we are getting ready to go into our fourth. So far the lecture topics have consisted of a variety of different things. I was able to teach one lecture with my friend Samantha Myers. Then we had the pleasure of having Dave Overholt from Canada taught on Identity in Christ, Maria Daughtry on the Holy Spirit, and then our base director Tom Osterhus will teach this week on Biblical Survey! God is really challenging me and bringing me out in a lot of new giftings!

This may seem a little bipartisan but, this DTS is one of the best schools that we've seen come to YWAM Maui. They are a very relaxed easy going school and they get along really well. They are really open to what the Lord has for them during this time!

I am really enjoying my time here at YWAM Maui, but what's awesome is that the Lord is speaking into what he has for me even more then I could have ever dreamed! I'll let you know what some of these details are as soon as I am able to share them! But I do need your prayer and support! Everything I do here I am on support so if God leads you to donate anything from Money to Airline Miles it would be appreciated! I love you all and wouldn't be able to be doing what I am doing without every one of you!

Not so familiar...

2008-07-22T22:24:00.000-07:00

The title of my blog is a journey to the familiar. The thing that I have discovered over the past three months is it is anything but familiar.

Letting that thought resound... I say that just as I would if holding a two edged sword. There are some truly amazing things about about my life here and there are somethings that I would undoubtedly change.

I arrived to the completely unknown, not knowing anyone, or anything in Hawaii. The transition to getting to know people was difficult at best.

But know I find myself becoming a part of the grand design that God has here at YWAM Maui. I find that my beliefs are being constantly sharpened. Through interaction with other's that I live in community with and through my own personal study of a vast array theological topics. I am currently reading The Great Doctrines of the Bible... It's a very dry book even in the humor but I find myself drawn to the insight it's giving me into my own beliefs. Prior to this point I thought some of the modern theologian's were dry and pious. Now I find myself rapt with fascination by their every word.

Right now my focus is on salvation and through my studies and interactions with other's I am seeing how different it's being done to how it's suppose to be done in this day and age. Compared to how it was done years ago. The vast difference is making it much more relationally and more about discipleship. I find that sometimes growing up in the church there is a significant lack of that in the world. So it creates Christian Leaders that don't see the point of it too much. But also in the secular realms they don't see the point either. So my challenge to myself has been how can I make the gospel message or my testimony that much more relate able to other's. By sharing exactly what I am sharing with you all right now. What God is doing in my life, not making it about at the end of the conversation to have successfully proselytizing them. But having a relationship where they understand that I care about them and much in the same way would be interested in their lives and in return would give me the same consideration. So in sharing what God is doing in my life they would understand what God's doing in my life and maybe see what he could be doing in their lives as well.

So a more practical side to the update, I have now had another position hat added to the ones on my head. As I shared previously I am the Registrar for our DTS (Discipleship Training School), and the office manager. In addition to those responsibilities I've also had added our secondary school, the School of Biblical Foundations and Missions Registrar, and Worship Coordinator/Director. The Registrar position for our secondary school is much the same as my primary job of DTS Registrar. But as Worship Coordinator/Director, I'm in charge of making sure that our base has worship twice a week. Whether it's myself or other's on base leading, I am actually very excited about this part of my job. I'm taking over for our worship leader that is going on a sabbatical. She's encouraged me to encourage other's to break out of their shells and see that they have the potential to lead Worship. Whether is singing or a time of reflection. I had the honor of leading such a worship time. In a modified stations of the cross. There was no set music being played but just music playing on an i-pod and different stations set up for people to worship, through prayer, reflecting, and communion. Hopefully there will be more of that in store for our base.

On a more humorous side - living with a bunch of guys there tends to be a certain shall we saw aroma that permeates our home. Lately in our bathroom it had become noticeably worse then average. And no one seemed to be claiming credit for it. Our bathroom is quite the feet of ghettoness. I assumed that perhaps in it's construction there might not be a seal on the dry wall so mold might be seeping into it. So my good friend Joshua Cordy took it upon himself to replace the dry wall. Once he removed the dry wall he discovered the source of the smell....

It was a rat...

a dead rat...

That had almost completely decomposed...

I leave you with that thought to wrestle with...

Mahalo,
Luke

Arriving and then some....

2008-06-09T21:30:00.000-07:00

Friends,

I beg your forgiveness as I have yet to make an update to all of you on my time thus far in Maui. I found that I wanted to find the right words to say but none ever came. I wanted to convey the beauty of this place both it's people and the nature around me. My words inadequately can do justice to either, but I will push through and do my best.

My first few days here were rough at best... I was hard to know which way was up. Here I was a big fish in a small pound with even bigger fish surrounding me. What I mean by that is every person that comes on staff generally has some connection with Maui in some way whether they did their Discipleship Training School here or did their School of Biblical Foundations and Missions. So they all have preexisting relationships and knowledge of each other. So not having either of those things working in my favor I set out two weeks ago this past Saturday not knowing what my future might hold. On my plane ride over I made a list of doubts that I had and by the end of that plane ride I was ready to get back on the plane and head home. Wait I know that this looks bad but there's more to the story then that. I arrived in Kahului to all the aforementioned junk. But there was something else that was pulling me to look in more. I still wanted to go home but there was a nagging feeling that I tried to ignore as the days progressed on from there I tried to be a nitpicker trying to pick up on the negative things in my new environment. Of course I found, but at the end of my first week I decided God you've got me here for a reason and a purpose so I'm going to stop making lists and stop keeping track of what's what here. That's when God really started to move... I began to feel a sense of belonging...

I've discovered that I fit here. Life here in Haiku isn't easy but I love it here and wouldn't rather be doing anything other then this. I can see myself here for a while yet to come...

Some may be asking why I'm not going into specifics about my day to day life here. I have trouble putting that part into words more then anything else. I want to convey what God's doing in my heart more then anything else. I feel God working on me in many ways, I feel that when I went to Australia I let YWAM change me. But this time around I feel that it's all God changing me. That when I pray something that I need to expect that God is going to move, that in his power and might he is mighty to do many things that we ask. Maybe not in the way that we'd expect but still He moves. Recently, our base started our summer DTS (Discipleship Training School), during worship one of our leaders relating a picture that God had given him. It was being tuned into alignment with God. He made the comparison of music - a guitar more specifically. But the point being made was in tuning a guitar you have sharps and flats that you are trying to force into alignment. Reflecting on that, that's what I feel God is doing in my life right now forcing me into alignment. It makes it sound like I am being forced into this being drug kicking and screaming. In the message in Matthew it talks about learning the unforced rhythms of God's grace. That's the transformation I feel taking place. Gracefully I am being brought into alignment with God's will and promises for my life. When I feel like the words being spoken to me by people or by God aren't going to happen I remember that every promise has the weight and honor of God behind it. Whom or what then shall I fear? See that excites me that lights the fire under my butt not the mundane things of this world. Not the filler like what I did in the office this week. Which has relevance and merit in my world, but not the importance of it.

I will endeavor to be more diligent in keeping you updated on my life here! Thank you for your prayer, love and support I would be utterly lost without them. Thank you for allowing me to be here it is truly the greatest blessing of my life!

Mahalo,
Luke

This that and some other things...

2008-05-11T06:04:00.000-07:00

Well here I am again waking up way to early. Happy Mother's Day to all of my motherly reader's... My own mother probably won't be reading this until I am in Maui! Well yesterday reached the two week mark till I leave so two weeks from yesterday at about 11:30 I will be departing Colorado on a seven and a half hour flight to Kahului Maui Hawaii, where I will be picked up by my new friends at YWAM Maui that are complete and total strangers for now! Freaky right? I think it's freaky....

I'm very excited about the time that I'll be able to serve in YWAM it's going to be an amazing opportunity for me to grow in God and well to grow up in many other sense's as well! I think that I have realized something pretty grounding though. I have said before to many people that I know that my identity is rooted in Christ not YWAM. But I've come to the conclusion that my identity in Christ is and was routed through YWAM. It was like saying first and foremost I was a YWAM and then a Christian second. So what does that mean in realizing that... Well for three year just about I've been trying tooth and nail to get back into YWAM because I am a YWAMer by george and I needed to be with me people! The people that didn't think that I was a charismatic freak (Side note to all of my readers, never have I felt that way around any of you hahaha.) I needed to be with my people will being out of YWAM for three years was hard and I endured the struggles of life and the struggles of being outside of YWAM. I felt like I needed to be in YWAM again to be myself, but I've found an awesome friend that has made me realize that I never needed to go back to YWAM to find that acceptance. There are awesome people like all of you and my friend in particular that love me and accept me just for who I am.

So in short I am going back into YWAM as Luke Sexson a confident Christian man that is going to let God guide and grow him in his journey's and adventure's through YWAM. He is a YWAMer, but first and foremost he is a a child of God. Okay now that I am done referring to myself in the third person... I am going to let God guide me through YWAM no matter what not matter how long 6 months 10 years! Whatever God's will for me is I am going to do it because he calls me to it...

Time is catching up with me...

2008-05-01T10:04:00.000-07:00

Wow... I looked at my countdown clock and it says that I have twenty two days left! That's nuts! Especially since it's May 1st and I don't leave until the 24th... I guess it counting the days and hours till I leave rather then the regular days... So I have 22 days left until I leave for Maui.

I've discovered one of my chief worries about this whole move is that I'm going to be the only new staff member coming on base... But I've since found out that I am going to be in good company with a bunch of new staff member's! It's exciting! If you remember keep me in your prayers about the new relationships that I'll be starting because everyone knows each other there and even the people coming back on base as staff have done their DTS their... So it's a bit intimidating but I'm ready for the challenge! It's still very crazy to me that it's 22 days! I've been saying till I leave for Maui instead of move because moving from Colorado and everyone here that I love so much makes me a little sad... So leaving seems like a better word to say. It's funny I'm not really struck by too many profound thoughts right now it seems to be a melancholy day... It's may and there is snow falling from the sky... It makes me more ready to leave... Here's to show the OCD side of my life I am fighting the urge to start packing. I think if I wait I look better/cooler/any positive attribute, then if I do I get made fun of for packing 22 days before I leave...

That is all! Love you all and you bless me immensely!

2008-04-28T06:20:00.000-07:00

Good Morning,

Again I apologize for my severe lack of diligence in updating my blog. However I am trying to make up for it but showing you a picture of where I am going to live. Specifically this is a photo of the guys staff house at YWAM Maui.

It's amazing my support letter's have gone out and I have seen an amazing response from them. In the two and a half weeks that my letter has now been out I have recieved 3,500 dollars! I am more then half way there for my budget for one year. However seeing as how my budget for the next two years is 12,000 dollars I still need 8,500 dollars! But God's really breaking through in the area of finances. So I am not in the least bit worried, I'm actually excited about the adventure ahead of me in Faith and Finances. Yesterday I heard the most amazing sermon, as I have mentioned my home church here in Colorado is preparing to move. Out capital campaign slogan is Called to Something big... Our church is needing to raise 26 million dollars in order to build our new building. Yesterday my pastor gave a sermon on John 5, the feeding of the five thousand. He focused on Phillip whom he asked/tested where they would find a.) the money or b.)where could they get the food. Phillip of course said that there was no chance that they could find any of this food anywhere. They did find a lad with five loaves of bread and three fish. Most of us know how the story goes Jesus performed a miracle and there was enough food for everyone. What Pastor Mike said towards the end of the sermon impacted me the most! He compared himself to Phillip who had doubts that they would be able to find enough food to feed everyone. Mike said that he doubted last week whether Mission Hills was making the right move. I heard that and instantly I related to him right then and there. Lately I've been petrified about leaving for Hawaii.... according to some I am not allowed to be scared about moving to Hawaii. It hasn't been about the destination that I am fearful of, it's what's being left behind. All of you, my friends and my family... My life... But I am trading that in for something new. I know that I know that I know that God is behind this move and I am so ready to jump in and serve him whole heartedly but I cannot help but be a little scared about this because it is something big! And it's happening the money is coming in, the pieces are falling into place. After that and talking to some friends of mine who are serving in the Middle East, I realized the sacrifice that they made but are choosing joy. I was instantly remind of the passage in the bible that says if you are not willing to sacrifice your mother your father, your whole life you do not deserve me. I need to be deserving of God and all that he has for me, I'm laying down my rights to you all... Because simply put I have none to any of you. All of you have shaped who I am and who I am going to become in some small ways and in some huge ways. It's a hard thing to do, I've had days where I am so willing to do that, and then others where I don't want to go.

I am stepping out in faith here in big ways and it is going to grow me. By no means is this going to be easy, but it's necessary for what God's called me too... 25 days is all that I have left till I leave. It's crazy to think that, this is it! But it is and there's many challenges that I have left to face in the coming days! Please join me in prayer for this big step! I am eager to begin my journey but also finding myself wondering the halls of life filled with nostalgia. I walk through my house thinking about what a long time it will be before I get to do this or that. Even as I wonder aimlessly through Mission Hills memories of my best friends walk past me. Thinking about the time that I was caught on the roof of the church when I was suppose to be in service listening intently to Bill Muhr or Sid Buzzell or maybe it was Jerry Shevland. Or the countless time friends and I have scared ourselves half to death because we've been at the church alone in the dark and an ungodly hour. Even as I sit here and think of all of the memories of you all my home. I'm not as frightened because in part I am taking a piece of each of you with me! Thank you all so much for your love and support they mean the world to me and I would be lost without them!

I wanted to share the sermon that impacted me so much that inspired this blog! I would encourage you to listen to it and let the message seep in deep!

http://www.missionhills.org/mediasource/mp3/080427.mp3

Love you all!

Luke

Time for a much needed update...

2008-04-10T06:29:00.000-07:00

Wow... I hadn't realized that I had not updated my blog in nearly a month! I've been writing a lot of my facebook blog but not of here. Well folks, I am now down to 43 days until I depart for Maui. A lot has happened since the last time I wrote. As most of you know I was waiting on rebooking my airline ticket because the prices were actually going down a lot. I had originally purchased my plane ticket for 255 and last week the ticket that I was watch dropped to 230. But then at the end of last week Aloha Airlines, ATA, and Airbus all went out of business, unfortunately that meant that airline tickets got jacked up immensely as well. That ticket I was watching went from being 230 to 620. Luckily for me Dad had a whole bunch of frequent flyer miles that he hadn't used and decided to let me use them. So I am leaving on May 24th four days later then I originally was planning. But now I also have a return ticket home at Christmas, I hadn't mentioned this before but I wasn't sure if I could come home at Christmas because of the ticket prices. So I am very excited that I get to come home at Christmas time. Then I think I'll be leaving for Maui again on January 5th... Depending on the ticket prices it might be a little bit earlier. Just because I'll hopefully be staffing the winter DTS at Base, and we'd have some training that would begin right around that time..

This week I've sent out my support letters so a lot of you should be getting them soon. If you didn't get one and would be interested in getting one please contact me and I'll get one to you ASAP!

Thank you!!!

2008-03-11T11:16:00.000-07:00

Friends I wanted to take the time today and thank you so much for the blessing that you've been in my life! It's truly blessed me beyond my wildest imaginings to be able share with some of you about the journey that God's got me on! In being able to speak to you about the path God's laid before me it prepares me more and more each and everyday! That's what amazes me, for the large part I haven't even started fund raising yet I am prepared to go because of being able to testify to what God has done for me!

At my church Mission Hills, one of their big goals for everyone in the congregation is impacting your world for God. I was thinking about that over the course of the past couple of days. They give these awards for "Being a Bridge" of influence to your community. It's a great thing to encourage people to do, but what strikes me is we have the ability to do this daily if we really think about it. But often enough we aren't in a very Christ centered frame of mind as we move through out the day. I am so guilty of doing this every single day sometimes multiple times a day. I'll see an elderly person on University Blvd struggling to push a cart up the hill towards Orchard Road but often times I think I should pull over and help that person even if it takes an hour. But then I try and rationalize my time schedule and soon I'm home after fighting with myself the whole way home. I want to strive to be like Jesus daily, Jesus wouldn't have hesitated to stop and help that elderly person. Yet I don't stop, I am to busy... and I want to be more like Jesus. I couldn't help but think of a video that I'd seen in Sunday School a couple of weeks ago called An inconvenient Jesus. That's how I treat opportunities to minister as an inconvenience, and the bible says "Doing unto the least of these you do unto me."

It's Tuesday and up at my church there is also a Food Bank that is run by some of the nicest sweetest ladies in creation. Writing on this particular subject matter makes me think about them. These ladies don't hesitate to lavish their love on the unlovable. The simple act of hugging these people that are in need is something that I would never do. Because they smell like smoke or they are missing their teeth. These awesome loving Godly ladies don't hesitate to love on them, and it's not out of some kind of guilty obligation it is out of a genuine desire to help these people.

I am humbled by the example of those that are older then me! I am now striving to be more like these ladies! Loving on people regardless of their social standing! What about you? How are you striving to be like Jesus? Are you like me and do you fall short? Let's take a stand! Let's be a different kind of Christian!

God let me fade away into the background and you step into greater prominence in my life daily!

Luke growing up? NOOO never...

2008-03-10T13:46:00.000-07:00

As loathsome as it is to admit this I really am seeing the point in staying here until May. Beyond the financial aspect of waiting, I am referring to the spiritual aspect of waiting. I am starting to see God's will for me in Maui starting to unfold. I am becoming more willing to do things that I never would have thought I'd be able to do. Like coming home for Christmas, I'm not sure if I'll be able to come home yet. I could be staffing a DTS at that stage or maybe just be needed to stay on base to help it stay running. But last week I was starting to flip out about not being able to come home for Christmas and be there with my family for a very important and special time. While that time is very important and very special, God's really smoothing out my rough edges whether I want them to be smooth or not. I am fully willing to do what God calls me to do even if that means spending time away from my family at the holidays. But that also goes beyond the holidays, I think that God is already speaking to me about being in Maui for more then two years. The reason for all of this is the testimonies that I am hearing coming out of Maui! It's truly amazing to hear the stories! About people praying for their parents to receive Christ and then hearing about what their kids are doing in the world God gets a hold of them! It's DTS's going into the red light district in Bangkok Thailand and ministering to prostitutes, or being in Bangladesh and having your whole team be in and out of the hospital but you keep on ministering. It's about being given the chance to go into countries that you've dreamed about going to and getting to minister! It's about sharing Christ with the people in the 10/40 window that need to hear it! That's why things that use to matter so much to me seem some what trivial!

Being here in Colorado it's safe, I have a roof over my head, I know that I can get encouragement and money. But being on the mission field I am going to be rocked to my core and I am going to have to put myself in positions where I am not comfortable or places where it's illegal to share the word of GOD! I stated that in some ways I regretted saying God I'll go send me! Now I am confident in what the Lord has for me to do! I'll shout it louder and louder. I want to decrease more and more and see God increase more and more. I am already seeing that happen in my life!

I am a preschool teacher (I know you look at me and that's the last thing you'd think right?) it's been awesome to share my passion for missions with my fellow teachers. Mostly because it causes them to examine where they're at and what they know about what's going on in the world. But it's also been a unique experience to share and pour into the lives of the kids I teach. Not even sharing about missions but taking a vested interest in them. In turn it's also allowed me to bless some parents, I have kids that are just the cutest things ever you want to take them home with you. But I have been able to share with their parents how much I enjoyed having them in class and it makes them feel a since of accomplishment almost that they are doing something right as parents.

It makes me think about the parental microscope that we have with God. God doesn't have anyone saying "You know Your son Luke, he's so great You must be really proud of him." I know that I want praise God for making me the way that I've been made because I know he made me that way. Much the same way a parent does with their children, they influence the child behavior and so and so forth. "God thank you for creating me with a heart for the lost and broken of this world! Thank you for giving me a purpose and a will for my life! I know that I may not always live that will out in my life but thank You for giving it to me!" I want to delight in my creator because He delights in me.

The reason that I am going back into YWAM is not because I think I have something to give to DTS students or to the world, but God has something that he needs to give to them. In mentoring a DTS student I want to only speak what God has for them into their lives! Like I said I want to decrease, because if I am doing that then I am able to be God's instrument more effectively.

I think in addition to all the cool spiritual stuff God's doing I'm gaining more patience as well because if you'll please note that I have not once mention how many days I have left till I leave for Maui (71 days by the way) I know that I have that on my facebook status but that's okay!

Thank you all so much for your prayers and your support they mean the world to me! and they are a blessing to me daily!

A Morning in which confusion abounds...

2008-03-09T06:44:00.000-07:00

Well I woke up way too early again but then something odd happened I glanced at my alarm clock and glanced at my laptop, the two times did not coincide with each other. For about point zero seconds I thought that I might have been caught in a time paradox. Then I realized that we are entering into Daylight Savings Time. Most people are going to be cursing Daylight Savings Time, not me because I'd already be up at this time anyway so this actually allows me to sleep in more without actually sleeping in HAHAHAHA! I bet the system... no not really but let's pretend like I did...

So YWAM Maui departure countdown... 72 days...

Yesterday I received my salvation my staff manual arrived in the mail yesterday. It was something tangible that made 73 days seem like nothing at all. I am very ready to go but I know that God's going to use this time that I have at home for something. I'm not quite sure what it's going to be yet but I know that it's going to be something big. I am praying for opportunities to come my way. I guess in a since I am having some opportunities in my actions with people. Yesterday something small seemed like something big to another... I was getting groceries for my belated birthday dinner, something that I was not overly thrilled about doing but resigned myself to the fact that I simply had to do it. But that's not the point of my story I was lurking in the produce section trying to find what vegetable I would chose to force upon neigh poison the family with. When an elderly lady dropped a couple of heads of lettuce on the floor I not even remembering being in a bad mood dropped to the ground and help her pick them up. When I looked at her she had an oxygen tube leading to a tank, and was obviously not in the best health. Normally when I see a person like that I fixate on the things coming out of them almost in a rude fashion. But God did something he allowed me to see past the tubes, to see past her age and to see her as He saw her his child someone He delighted in. It's funny to think that I didn't realize that until now. This makes me that much more excited to go! God's going to be doing some awesome things in my life during the next season. I need to be ready for them I need to even before I go need to be actively looking for ways in which I can minister to people...

Like I've previously mentioned hopefully I am going to be getting my support letters out to all of you lovely people! I am also hoping to meet with the Action Teams at my church (for those of you that don't know an Action Team is Mission Hills Church slang for missions committee but broken down into the geographic locations.) to see if they were to offer any financial assistance on my up and coming adventure! If you're reading this and you feel God telling you to support my ministry in Maui please contact me and I'll tell you how you can accomplish this...

Refine me further and further...

2008-03-08T05:41:00.000-08:00

Guess what I woke up this morning wishing that I was somewhere I am not yet! I am wishing that time would move faster and that I could be there NOW! 73 days, five hours and 14 minutes is seeming like forever. Yes I am that big of a freak that I would do this have a count down, down to the minute... It's weird to for the past week for no apparent reason I've been getting up at 5 or 6 in the morning! Maybe God's telling me that I need to be starting of my day more with Him. That or I am going to be ready tomorrow when Daylight Savings Time begins.

Right now I am just needing to find a simple job for the next 73 days. Something to help me have some money of my own to help out when I am over in Maui! Right now though I am really confused as to what to do with my remaining time. I feel like there is something that I need to be doing with my time. Mostly because I've number one stopped leading in the youth group. Let me just say that the past five years of my life being involved in that youth group have truly been the most rewarding of my life. But I am glad that, that season of my life is over because, I feel like if I was still involved in the youth group that I wouldn't be able to truly and freely go over to Maui! I would have been concerned about my relationships with my students that I wouldn't be able to let go and focus of all the things that need to be done with going to Maui! So that's been a huge blessing, Secondly I don't have a job that is really consistent I am a substitute preschool teacher at the Mission Hills Early Learning Center. That's been AWESOME, I love hanging out with the preschoolers or having them hang out on me! It's funny what a difference I didn't realize that I could be making on these kids lives. I had a mother walk up to me yesterday and told me that her two year old talked about me all the time and that apparently I taught him the right way to was his hands even though they'd done it. Having an impact like that on such a small scale makes me want to be ready to have an impact on a larger scale. Like with the Students on DTS's that I'll lead or staff, or even greater the people in the various parts of the world that I'll be ministering too!

It's funny though, I never thought that I would be a full time missionary, part-time maybe, short-term you bet ya! But when I told God I'll go any where you want me to I didn't think that it will be taking me to Thailand, Nepal, Indonesia, and other countries. I didn't think that I really had a heart or a passion for these countries. Boy WAS I ever wrong! I hear stories from all of the outreaches that the base has been on and I think I want to be there and I want to minister to them! Or more to say that I want to be use by God to minister to them!

People may scoff at me saying that I feel God calling me to be apart of ministry in Maui but it's the truth. God's been doing so much in my life to make me ready to be a part of that ministry it's exciting! God's orchestrated a lot already for me to get over there! And I'm still here in Colorado!

Hopefully by this next week you guys should be receiving my support letter! If you want to receive it please just drop me a line and let me know! Thank you all your a blessing to me in so many ways! Thanks to your support your allowing me to pursue God's will for my life!

I need to learn more words for excited...

2008-03-07T14:01:00.000-08:00

Well 74 days remaining in Colorado the 303! I am ready to be in Maui now, but obviously that's not happening so I am needing to learn to be content in the moment and to learn how to hold my plans loosely! Right now I am really being blessed by people around me allowing me to share what I am going to be doing with them! I've been invited over by a family that I love to share with them what I am going to be doing it's so cool! I've got friend's that are wanting to be invested in my ministry prayerfully and financially! It's really cool because I've always thought that as a generation we weren't ready to be involved in financially supporting a missionary! I was so glad to be proven wrong! God's provision and fingerprints are already all over this journey that I am going to be on! It's so cool! All I want to do is share what God's doing and how he's providing for me! I definitely know that this is God taking me on this journey! AWESOME no?

Please continue to pray for me there's a lot that needs to be done in the time that I have remaining! Like to finish raising my support, getting churches to support me, getting everything in order to go over to Maui!

Thank you friends for blessing me!

Before it was said...

2008-03-05T13:39:00.000-08:00

It's been quite some time since I've put anything up here which seems to be a common excuse for me. I will try to be much more diligent about updating my blog! Well I was suppose to be leaving in less the twenty-four hours from now! But now I am putting off my departure by at least 75 days! I'm going to be going over with my parents full blessing! So my new departure date is May 20th of 2008! Seventy-five days! It seems like a long time but just a short while ago it was a lot longer then that! The time that I have left in Colorado is going to fly by! My short term aims for right now are to try and find a job for the remainder of time that I have left in Colorado. If anyone is looking for a Nanny or something till the summer give me a call!

I've been thinking a lot about my upcoming adventure and a lot of other little stuff. I've been processing a lot of stuff, feeling scared about what's going on in my life! It's a pretty big change to be making. I guess it's the same feeling that I had when I left for Australia and I had just left my family at security and started down the escalator and I was traveling by myself for the very first time. When I left for Australia I didn't let myself think about the leaving but the adventure. Right now it's the reverse. I'm sure that once I get on that plane I am going to be so ready to get to Maui and to begin my ministry there! Lately when I think about leaving I'm not as scared. Which I guess is a really good thing! Don't get me wrong I think that leaving is going to be hard! But I think that since I am processing all that I am leaving it's going to be not as hard.

I'm excited to be expanding my family! No not that way! But gaining more people into my adopted family! I go visit YWAM Maui's website and exchange emails with the people who are on staff and they are a fully bonded family! That's exciting for ME!!! Seventy-six DAYS! BAHAHAHA I'm excited! Needless to say anyone who reads this knows this!

Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, Oh my GoSH!!!

2008-02-24T16:28:00.000-08:00

So it has been quite sometime since I've posted on the comings and goings in my life lately. I've been posting notes on my facebook more then I have here but that will soon have to change! So my life has been soooo crazy right now... To a degree and a power that I cannot even believe. So I'm just going to flat out tell you all what's been happening. On Friday or Thursday I got the call that I accepted to YWAM Maui as a staff person. Intense right? Well here's where the story gets even hotter! So I was thinking okay God I'll go to Maui in September October no problem plenty of time to do all that needs to be done right? Right! Wrong oh so very wrong at least according to what God says. He really challenged me that I needed to sacrifice and I needed to press into him more and more and really give my all to him. I told God okay I'll go in May you know that gives me plenty of time to fundraise and get everything going! Wrong again... I get the call from the personnel director at my base in Paia and she asks if I could be there in two weeks. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA crazy right... So after God's just been talking to me about sacrifice and such I knew what I had to do I had to sacrifice and give it up to him...

At this point I am so scared because I don't have any of the money raised just have my support letter done you know that's it. I haven't sent it out, I haven't met with anyone on the missions board to get approval of having funds donated to me. I just told God that I could not and can not do this but if it's his will for my life then he needed to move. Keep in mind that this is just within the past two days... Then I get up today and am still panicking about everything that needs to happen in order to get all of this done. So I pray to God, "God give me someone to buy me my plane ticket to Maui." I shared my prayer request with my sunday school class and a friend of mine Matt walks up to me and asks how much my plane ticket costs. I tell him $245 and then he tells me that he would like to buy my plane ticket for me. I am having a cow at this stage because I cannot even believe what I am just hearing. He tells me to find him after church and we will buy it online. I'm thinking okay this guys off his nut there is no way that this is really going to happen!!!!!!! So after my buddy Matt walks away another friend of mine walks up and gives me a check for 50 dollars! Amazing! I cannot believe what's been happening... But wait then another friend walks up to me and tells me that she wants to give me a check tonight at church. God's really been pouring on the blessing for me in a huge way!!!!! Then after church I find my friend Matt and I ask him again if he really wants to buy my plane ticket and he goes yes yes I do want to buy your plane ticket!!!!! So my prayer was specifically answered! It was so awesome too because he had prayed for something to do with his tax return. So I was an answer to his prayer and he was an even bigger answer to my prayer!! God is blowing my sox off!!! So this morning I needed 724 dollars to get over to Maui not to be fully funded but to start up over there. At the close of today I need 300 dollars! That's in the span of two DAYS that all of this has happened!!! I cannot believe the goodness and the grace that God has just bestowed on my life!!!! That's my update and I cannot tell you what a big huge praise God that it!!!!

Who will go? Send me!

2008-02-16T18:04:00.000-08:00

God,

You've truly been amazing me in preparing my heart to go over to Maui! I'm more excited about serving there then living in Maui! I'm ready to live my life for you and give all my control over to you! I want to go make an impact on people and lives for you! I'm sick of the status quo with life in general but even more so in the church! I want to GO! God send me!!!!

Too ready!!!

2008-02-13T09:08:00.000-08:00

So it's been such a journey getting myself ready for the next step in my journey back YWAM. I found this blog of a girl that use to staff at YWAM Maui! Hearing the stories just makes me that much more excited about going to Maui and getting involved in ministry there. Being in Maui is going to be so nice but even more then that it's going to be so awesome to be in the YWAM family full time! I'm realizing that there are certain things that I am going to have to change about myself going back into YWAM again. Living in community and such but I am SOOO ready for this! I'm too ready I find myself wishing that it was September or August already!!!! It's just time for me to strike out on my own!!

a crescendo

2008-02-10T15:08:00.000-08:00

Today I went to church and I'd not been in a while but I felt like I really needed to go for some reason! God gave me the opportunity to speak into a friends life and that felt really good. Often times I just get really caught up in doing things that I don't realize what God's given me to do! I went to a Sunday School and the discussion was about pride. I'm realizing that in this season of essentially of humbling myself that my PRIDE will and can get in the way of what God's doing to prepare me for this time! Like praying selfishly I think that I am guilty of doing that a lot, so I decided today with my fund raising that I am just going to trust God because He's put me on this path and he's got everything planned out for me! I am excited about even working towards getting a job to work for the money to support myself while I return to YWAM. I'm just awed by God and him bringing me to place where I feel his peace about going back. Even with those people that don't think I should go back to YWAM God's given me a peace about that to. I feel like he's saying "I've put you down this path and no ONE can distract you from it! Go Luke! Go Foward and be determined to do my will!

It was also cool because the guy who gave the sermon was from India. He's a member of the Dalit - which literally means that these people get treated like they are less then human. In the Indian caste system the higher castes cannot even have a member of the dalit have their shadow cast on them because that would in a sense make them unclean. The caste system in India has been in place for 3,000 years so the dalit have been treated this way for that amount of time. The statistics of the dalit's were enough to bring me to tears. There are 250 million dalit that's 25% of the population of India, the same as the entire population of America! There are something like 18 rapes that occur with the dalit's a day and they cannot even enter a police station to report the case because of the caste system.

I titled this blog a crescendo because when I hear messages like this is crescendo's the passion for missions that God's given me! I want to go to these places and minister to these kids to these people to love them because no one else will love them! To share God and His amazing love with them! I am so excited to be going to a place where I can do just that. It's funny people say the same thing when I tell them I'm moving to Maui to staff with YWAM. "Suffering for Jesus" I laugh indulgently at them, but God's calling me there because it is a great place that I can be based out of and travel to places like India or Indonesia or where ever and share God! Even in Hawaii I can share GOD! In addition to that, that is where my organization YWAM is based out of! So I know that I can do a lot there! I am tentatively looking to travel to Maui in September I would try to travel sooner but alas a lot of you who are reading this are getting married and I would love to be able to share you wedding days with you! hahaha... September is the latest that I would leave I might try to leave in August. I am going to be spending this time working and attending school as well. I've recently left my voluntary position as a leader in the youth group at Mission Hills! As sad as I am about leaving it's very exciting because now I can fully focus on serving God in preparing for my return to YWAM! I am excited to begin fundraising, in total I am going to need to make 7,200 dollars a year! It's not a lot to raise and I am anxious to begin the process. If you would like to donate to me and my ministry that I am about to embark upon contact me and I'll let you know how you can help!

Contemplating a change...

2008-02-09T07:46:00.000-08:00

So it's been three years since I've left America to go to Australia to attend my DTS. The past three years haven't been easy by any stretch of the imagination, I've struggled being home so much, I don't know if it's because I really miss living in community or miss the challenge of being in YWAM. It's like everything in my life for the past three years I've constantly compared to those six months on DTS. For other people who've been on DTS and even those that were on mine have found it easy to move on and move away from YWAM. YWAM was just a stop on their journey to what they were suppose to do. But for me it's bigger then that I feel like I am YWAM, I always would say that I am a YWAMer. I can proudly say that I am fluent in ywamese. So I am YWAM and feel like I am being challenged to go back to that place in my life again. It's like God had so much left to do in my life and YWAM was an important piece of that.

My problem which I've addressed multiple times is that I am a people pleaser in the largest since of the word. There are people in my life that don't understand YWAM which is because they've never been involved in YWAM except vicariously through my experience. While the experience was the most amazing thing that's ever happened in my entire life it wasn't as such for them. I understand that there are certain expectations from people on me. You know to go to College and to get the degree and to be a good student and all that stuff. But I am wondering right now if I can meet those expectations. I mean it should be easy right just to do what people expect of you? Well what about when God has something that he wants you to do with your life does that trump what people want? It really should right? So I need to do this I need to move out on my own and make my own mistakes! There's a song by FFH called before it was said it totally talks about that issue!

Every day I sit and pray to God above

To watch over me and my family

But every day I seem to pray the same old thing

In the same old way, and I start to think

That maybe I should change

And find something better to say

But I've learned to believe

You always hear me when I pray

So I get down on my knees

'Cause I'm stronger than these

Voices inside of my head

They try to deceive me

And make me believe

That I would be better instead

To take my requests and put them to rest

But your already one step ahead

You knew just what I would say Before it was said

Every night I lie awake wondering

If you're listening to every heartbeat

You've told me that You know the deepest part of me

And You'll watch over me and my family

So I guess I shouldn't change

'Cause you hear every word I say

And I knew you are here

When I come to you this way

So I guess I shouldn't change

'Cause you hear every word that I say

And I knew you were here

When kneel down today